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Thread: Love myself, love life

  1. #471

    Join Date
    May 2007
    , ,
    Oh, I love this last post of yours Jenny! So, so astute! thank you for sharing your insights with us! Hugs!

  2. #472
    Quote Originally Posted by skylark View Post
    Oh, I love this last post of yours Jenny! So, so astute! thank you for sharing your insights with us! Hugs!
    Thank you, dear skylark, for letting me know my understanding is insights for other people. Really glad to know this and I just had some new thoughts about that quote.

  3. #473
    Jerry and Esther have left their bus behind. They have found some other things that are working better for them, more efficient for them.They are finding more time to do other things they are wanting to do. And every now and again they find themselves justifying why they are no longer driving the bus. And part of it is because they loved it so much that it feels wrong not to love it equally as much as they one time loved it. Like once you appreciated something that you must always hold yourself in that same state of love and appreciation for it.

    We want them and you to understand that as long as you're appreciating something, it's the act of appreciating not the object of attention that you are appreciating that is important. You see.


    I am a voice lover. I am a sound lover. I still remember my extremely strong appreciation of so many beautiful human voices when I began to listen to audio dramas. I would attentively focus on every component, including the unique nature of human voices, their emotions displayed in dialogues or monologues, the background music, and sound effects appearing at times. I filled my notebook with my appreciation of them. During that time, I almost liked every drama I found just like my nephew, who is interested in every word coming out of our mouths at present.

    Two years have passed, after neglecting this sound world for some time, I want to pick and enjoy some dramas again. When I think of this world of voices and sounds, I immediately sense some guilt creep in as soon as I realize that so many voices I once so loved are not attractive to me now. How could I feel so indifferent to them now? To these voices, these wonderful voice-actors who had brought me so many good feelings?

    Then I remember Esther and Jerry's thoughts/justification about why they left their monster bus. It's easy to get into the justifying mode in order to feel better if we were in guilt. But now that I know better, I don't need to go down that path anymore. I don't need to feel guilty. I don't need to justify myself. Things are continually evolving. My preferences continually evolve and change. This is a Universal law. Take it easy. After thinking like this, I begin to take a new path of clearly updating my present preferences of audio dramas. I list the voices that I still like very much. I think about the desirable storylines. I imagine putting different voices together in my mind to see whether they would make a good match.

    In the past few days, I have been milking these new thoughts. I enjoy the fun of imagination. One of the results was:

    I rendezvoused with episode 1 of a "new" drama and I enjoyed it very much the day before yesterday. One thing led to another; I began to read the novel which was the origin of the drama. Just now, I searched on a related webpage and good news happened to me. Episode 2 of this drama just came out. In this specific sound world, often you may have to wait for several years for the next episode of a drama, or it just ended without an ending.

    So, again, I witnessed the power of my focus. I searched the information of episode 1--it came out about two years ago. It's good I can immediately listen to the sequel. It also reminds me of a lovely memory: I had been re-reading my favorite novel for some days before my brother's wedding, full of appreciation. Then on his wedding day, I found out the theme of the wedding had the same name with this novel. And its name in English would be: Being Here for You, Always.

  4. #474
    About Multi-tasking

    Recently, my ability to multitask improves a great deal, so much so that I am willing to make the best of the sporadic times such as 20 seconds. Thanks to my nephew and my niece for inspiring/(forcing) me to become more multi-tasking in a primarily aligned state.

    I combine multi-tasking with my own preferences.

    I like undividedly focusing upon something wanted. Imagine that there are two kids who have different personalities and interests, and who may easily get into a fight after immediately hugging and kissing each other. And imagine that I don't do pre-paving about that and I have to keep them safe. With them rarely having long-term harmony, I am busy separating them, and getting irritated and then getting angry with their parents, etc.

    I dragged molding the energy, so things got worse to a point that I had to pre-pave about it. Obviously hoping that only us three staying together happen as less as possible(/pushing against what I didn't want) didn't work well.

    So what can I do?

    Having to make peace with where I am. Making the best of that very-possible-to-happen scenario. Focusing upon the time segments when they are enjoying their own activities respectively, when they are hugging and kissing and enjoying each other, and when they are sharing the same interest. These time segments still exist. Reminding myself that quickly separating them when they get into a fight is in fact an easy thing.

    And clearly noticing that the key thing that made me irritated was that I felt I was wasting my time by just looking at them with some negative expectations. Then my thoughts would brew into blame of other family members, and on and on. So why not directing my attention otherwise while still giving them some attention? For example, taking a notebook and writing what I want. By doing so, I would have much less time to feel irritated, to blame, to get into anger...

    I applied that. I began to be busy doing my writing--putting the paper at any surface that was convenient. From time to time, they would get attracted by what I was doing and my nephew would ask me to draw a bus for him. I would. I would quickly draw a bus on the same paper, and soon he felt satisfied and left to have other fun. When they began to fight for something, I would quickly put down my pen to handle that. Then I went back to my writing...

    I felt such a strong feeling of accomplishment when I was pondering my emotional ups and downs during that time period--because I was primarily in alignment. Because I was in alignment, no blame, let alone anger followed. This lasted for about 5 days. I knew I had greatly shifted my vibe. No yearning for avoiding situations like this. Instead, I got more leeway and willingness to have fun with them.

    It seems that I got busier, and had more things to tend to, but the multi-tasking helps me to put the majority part of my focus/airtime on what I want. By focusing upon what I want, I feel good, and by feeling good, my perspective of my nephew, my niece and other family members immediately shifts, while before, I would offer much effort to clean up my blame or anger, to no avail.

    So, multi-tasking is very beneficial in similar situations. And writing of course is a powerful way of focusing.

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