Page 1 of 9 123456 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 87

Thread: Dealing with past & unfulfilled desires from the past.

  1. #1

    Dealing with past & unfulfilled desires from the past.

    Clearly I have come here for help and because I've read Ask & It is Given (a year ago yes but I intend to reread it), and so to discuss within that framework my issues which I find difficult to bring in line with the Abe teachings. Isn't one of the reasons this forum exists is to help people?

    Quote Originally Posted by marc
    sailorboat, the other piece I think you're missing is that if your Inner Being agreed with your perspective that your desires aren't possible, then you wouldn't feel such discord when you think those thoughts. Similarly, Rainsong, when you offer a perspective that you can't possibly find any satisfaction unless things come about just so, you feel the discord of that because your IB doesn't agree with that either. In both cases, your IB knows that what you want is real, it's possible, there are ways to go from where you are to where you want to be, but you've got to be willing to move in the direction of what you want. You're never going to be able to get LOA to deliver the goods by threatening to hold your breath until you turn blue.
    Marc it's not just thoughts, it's experience. I don't know where these guys who are in their 30s hooking up with girls a decade or more younger than themselves are from, but where I'm from it's socially unacceptable, it also doesn't feel right to me anymore because I'm no longer a young man. Furthermore to be told on several occasion by young girls in places you'd liked to have frequented as a younger man that you are too old to be there is soul destroying.

    Quote Originally Posted by forever becoming
    Ageism is a real thing in society, I dont want to push against this and make it bigger but at the same time its pretty degrading and disempowering to women (and men) if you believe all the bs.
    I'm not making these things up they are now my experience. Not only is it no longer socially acceptable for me to try to hook up with young girls, I no longer have social access to places where people in their young 20s go.

    What I'm writing must sound aweful to some of the ladies here, but just to be clear it applies as much to women as it does men, it's not a hard and fast rule but young women should be messing around with young men in their prime while they are young. The reason I have so much trouble with it and would like very much to experience young women is only because I missed out on that, not because I have some obsession with young girls, this sense of urgency occurred to me aged 29 not before and there are plenty of attractive older women but they experienced life and not stunted development when it comes to relationships.

    You mention inner being, well I can tell you that when I think thoughts of ending my life I start to feel at peace, so does that mean my IB is agreeing with me? Rather than the utter grief I have by realising I missed out on my youth, and this means a lot more than just relationships.

    I cannot see how I can fulfill my desires as a young man in his prime since the key is being a young man in his prime which I no longer am.

    Quote Originally Posted by marc
    You're the creator of your reality and none of the silly rules you've decided keep you from having what you want are actually

    Again, if it's more important to you to keep insisting that you're right so that you're okay with just continuing your suffering, there's really not a lot left for us to talk about. You've got to demonstrate at least a bit of willingness to move in the direction of what you want, if you want this conversation to continue.
    It is not just my belief it is now the reality I'm coming across, it's socially unacceptable for me to be hitting on girls who are a decade or more younger than me, I am coming across objections from people. To tell me I'm the creator is to tell me that I can plant corn in autumn and expect it to grow ready for Winter, I'm now in the Autumn period of my life regarding young women and you expect me to start planting?

    Surely then accepting that the boat was missed and sailed and that I won't be able to experience young girls just as all my peers did (and I mean this socially as well), might at least give me some peace? Rather than teasing myself that I can have something that's gone and prolonging my suffering. Perhaps then instead of grief I can have a little sadness, that's slightly higher up on the vibrational chart, no?

    Quote Originally Posted by paradise-on-earth
    People live what you want all over the place and are very happy and successful with it. But even if it would happen right under your nose, to give you a soothing or inspiring and -empowering example, you wouldn´t appreciatively embrace it right now, wouldn´t you?
    You are right I probably wouldn't, because I feel I missed the boat and it would cause me additional mental suffering.

    If I was 25 maybe I could change this circumstance but I really don't see how I can fulfill it now.

    I try to be grateful I really do, I've tried the things in the book, I know the book is right, and while yes I could probably get to a better place in life, I still feel anything now would be 2nd rate and past it.

    Quote Originally Posted by marc
    sailorboat, at this point it's pretty clear that you're not interested in applying Abraham's teachings and it's really not possible or even desirable to try to convince you when it seems all you want to do is prove your own powerlessness. As such, I'm going to go ahead and close this thread. If at some other point you decide you'd like to actually do the work, you're welcome to open another thread.
    I'm trying to apply it marc, but I just don't see how, it's like asking me to walk on water. The odds are against me, I'm not in the prime of my youth wanting to experience the prime of my youth. I know the Abe material will tell me to change my thoughts to change my beliefs but that's nigh on impossible from what I've experienced, because ageing is a reality that no one can run away from.

    The Abe teachings seem to do little about dealing with the past or past desires since they presume they are all irrelevant you are only present, yet our past is with us of this there is no doubt, I can't lie to myself about it.

    Even when I don't want anything anymore even then I can't stop suffering, living a life filled with regret and illness. I'm going for therapy have been depressed for a long time now, whether I think thoughts or not, emotionally I feel unwell all the time.

  2. #2
    wow....interesting title of the thread...it suddenly reminded me that all my desires on my list,one after one,some of them with some delays,but all of them were fullfilled-fate even took me thousands of kilometres to fullfill some of them.........now i have a different problem:dealing with the past and my fullfilled desires from the past....yes,its a problem...cuz now i have new desires and those old ones are already aging and out of date for me....i try to focus on my new desires,on these fresh ones,but my old desires-these fullfilled ones seem to be in the way...is appreciating old desires and focusing on them an obstacle?.....to create new reality?....does it cause continuing status quo?

  3. #3
    You are still arguing for your limitations.
    And LoA says that all limitations are self-imposed,
    why don't you want to try that approach out?
    Now you're gonna say "because of experience" when the only reason you're having a, dear I say, crap experience is because of your self-imposed limits,
    where you are just not Allowing LoA to work in your Wanted way.
    How are there people who are having experiences similar to what you are wanting to experience,
    yet you are a "special snowflake" that Law of Attraction apparently doesn't work for like you are trying to argue here?
    How does it feel to be the only anomaly in nature? How's that working out for you?

    I mean all this from a loving point of view because I'd very much like for you to have the experiences you are wanting
    but you just can't get there from there.
    You can't get to the solution from arguing for your problems.

  4. #4
    Quote Originally Posted by wolf View Post
    You are still arguing for your limitations.
    And LoA says that all limitations are self-imposed,
    why don't you want to try that approach out?
    Now you're gonna say "because of experience" when the only reason you're having a, dear I say, crap experience is because of your self-imposed limits,
    where you are just not Allowing LoA to work in your Wanted way.
    How are there people who are having experiences similar to what you are wanting to experience,
    yet you are a "special snowflake" that Law of Attraction apparently doesn't work for like you are trying to argue here?
    How does it feel to be the only anomaly in nature? How's that working out for you?

    I mean all this from a loving point of view because I'd very much like for you to have the experiences you are wanting
    but you just can't get there from there.
    You can't get to the solution from arguing for your problems.
    I am quite the anomaly and it hurts, 32 and no experiences. I have no idea where to begin with what you have written and while yea I believe the LOA could deliver relationships and fun with the opposite sex when I get better, I do find it difficult to see how I could do so with young women in their prime and thus get it out of my system, yes I'm arguing for my limitations but my lack of experience is damning now.

    When I was in my early 20s in the prime of my life I don't remember many girls getting with guys over 30, in fact I only remember one instance (I thought it was perfectly ok but a lot of girls I knew thought it was a huge gap and passed comment), why? Because everyone that age considered 30+ to be old, youth is not eternal.

    I am asking the universe to be a young man in my prime, so early 20s and experience these things, the first reality is I'm not in my early 20s. So not sure how that can be delivered.

    Sigh and must my posts be saged?

  5. #5
    Super Moderator WellBeing's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    14,981
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by marc
    sailorboat, at this point it's pretty clear that you're not interested in applying Abraham's teachings and it's really not possible or even desirable to try to convince you when it seems all you want to do is prove your own powerlessness. As such, I'm going to go ahead and close this thread. If at some other point you decide you'd like to actually do the work, you're welcome to open another thread.
    I'm trying to apply it marc,...
    In keeping with the intention of your new thread--and I’m asking this in all seriousness, without any judgement or recrimination--how are you trying to apply these teachings? Where precisely are you attempting to apply these teachings? What piece of these teachings are you applying or considering as you wrote this (or your other) post?

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    ... but I just don't see how, it's like asking me to walk on water.

    You’ve shared with us that you’ve read AAIIG but, as it was suggested in your previous thread, that you’ve not brought what you’ve read to this discussion. So, the logical starting point for us to have a productive conversation is to either ask you which piece of these teachings would you like to discuss to gain your own understanding about how to apply these teachings or to recommend that you read an Abraham book (either the same one or a different one) so that we can then have a basis upon which we can discuss the application of these teachings.

    Here’s a great case-in-point:
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    The odds are against me,...

    They are, as long as you continue to tell that story. That’s how you create your own reality and, with that story, you are creating a reality wherein “the odds are against me.”

    If you’d like to create a different reality, you could start to tell a story which might be something like
    “I’m told that I create my own reality and I’ve decided that I want to stop creating a reality wherein ‘the odds are against me.’ I don’t see how reality can morph yet into such a reality. But, just for this moment, because I want to feel better for this moment, I am willing to open myself to consider the potential that Abraham are right and that I could, somehow, create a reality for myself wherein the odds could be in my favour. That would be nice.”

    Now, even that gentle statement might be too far of a stretch from your practised habit of belief and you might have to dial back what I’ve written above to the point where the statement seems true to you and yet feels a little like relief. But part of that is that you have to be willing to let go of your belief which does not serve you and which does not feel so good to you and simply lean in the direction that there’s another way of looking at the world than the way you’ve been practising. And then you have to be willing to continue to lean in that direction simply because it feels better.

    So far, every reply that you’ve attracted has given you an opportunity to practise your unhelpful story and vibration here, which is the opposite of what you’re telling us here that you want.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I know the Abe material will tell me to change my thoughts to change my beliefs but that's nigh on impossible from what I've experienced,...

    And what you’ve experienced you have created for yourself by the beliefs that you’ve been practising. As Marc told you before, the LoA will “prove” you “right”: “You get what you think about whether you want it or not.”

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    ... because ageing is a reality that no one can run away from.

    But what “ageing” means to everyone varies. That’s where your thoughts and your beliefs come into play. You are defining “ageing” in a way that you clearly don’t want, where others can focus on that same subject more towards their Wanted end of the stick (called “aging”) and create for themselves a very different experience than the one you are calling to you.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    The Abe teachings seem to do little about dealing with the past or past desires since they presume they are all irrelevant you are only present, yet our past is with us of this there is no doubt, I can't lie to myself about it.

    Only to the extent that you bring it into your present. That really is all about you and your focus. There are many things about your past--many wanted things from your past--which you are not bringing into your powerful now. You’ve been able to leave behind, in the past, what you had for lunch on the second Tuesday of March 17 years ago. You’ve been able to leave behind various fashion choices or haircuts from your past. If you’re able to leave those things behind, your logic has to tell you that you can leave other bits of your past in your past. However, if you continue to focus on them now, you drag them into your now. That’s how you are bringing those things into your present.

    Now, this wouldn’t be any “problem,” if you were bringing into your present things that you want or things that felt “good” or “better” to you when you think about them. But you have been dragging into your present something which you’ve been using to squelch the life out of the present. That’s an unhelpful thing for you to do to yourself and you can feel the negative emotion you create for yourself when you do that to yourself.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Even when I don't want anything anymore even then I can't stop suffering, living a life filled with regret and illness. I'm going for therapy have been depressed for a long time now, whether I think thoughts or not, emotionally I feel unwell all the time.

    Just from this passage alone I could see how someone in your situation might want to feel better. After all, that’s why you’re going to therapy (and other things), presumably. When you read your Abraham book, you might be surprised to learn that Abraham teach us to feel better, which is what you're asking for right here (and in your therapy, and other things). So, if you could just put this throbbing issue to one side for just a little while, you might be able to read and understand these teachings more readily without this throbbing issue (and your arguments) blocking the knowledge that you want to acquire. After all, it's not like the past is going to change itself whilst you read and learn these teachings, is it?

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    ... Ask & It is Given (a year ago yes but I intend to reread it)...

    How about now?

    Because it’s not possible to discuss any subject (like these teachings) when you’re not really including them in your discussion. We can only then draw two conclusions from that:

    1. You don’t yet grasp these teachings enough to include them in your discussion (so, in order to have a helpful conversation with you, we have to start our discussion in a different place than you want to) OR
    2. They don’t wish to discuss these teachings or the application of them (in which case that’s a different intention than this Forum)


    We have a way forward with conclusion #1, so we can work with you. With conclusion #2, we have far fewer options.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Isn't one of the reasons this forum exists is to help people?

    I’m sure Marc clarified this in your PM conversation with him the other day, but allow me to chime in. This forum exists to help people apply these teachings, yes. As part of that intention and part of our understanding of these teachings, we know that we are not “helping people” (in either the way that you might mean that phrase or that I’ve explained that phrase) by allowing them to practise a vibration they clearly do not want. For that reason, we have our Sounding Board Policy. That’s why we close threads. It's not the “censorship” that you’re presenting.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by marc
    sailorboat, the other piece I think you're missing is that if your Inner Being agreed with your perspective that your desires aren't possible, then you wouldn't feel such discord when you think those thoughts. Similarly, Rainsong, when you offer a perspective that you can't possibly find any satisfaction unless things come about just so, you feel the discord of that because your IB doesn't agree with that either. In both cases, your IB knows that what you want is real, it's possible, there are ways to go from where you are to where you want to be, but you've got to be willing to move in the direction of what you want. You're never going to be able to get LOA to deliver the goods by threatening to hold your breath until you turn blue.
    Marc it's not just thoughts, it's experience.

    But your thought create your experience. That’s why we work with your thoughts. (Actually, we work with your vibration, which you direct with your thoughts, but that’s splitting hairs.) It’s your thoughts which called to you your experiences. It’s why others, with their different thoughts, are having their different experiences.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I don't know where these guys who are in their 30s hooking up with girls a decade or more younger than themselves are from, but where I'm from it's socially unacceptable,...

    So, you’re willing to let those who get to label “socially acceptable/unacceptable” to create your reality. That’s good to know. It’s good to know when you’re giving away your power, isn’t it?

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    it also doesn't feel right to me anymore because I'm no longer a young man.

    It doesn’t feel “right” because you’ve been telling yourself a story about how it isn’t “right.” This is a perfect example of how your thoughts create your own reality.

    And you’ve told us that you’ve decided to think your thoughts because there are those (and I bet you can’t even identify them) who get to label things “socially acceptable/unacceptable.” You’ve decided to make their opinion more important to you than what you or what some “young girl” might prefer instead. That’s good to know.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Furthermore to be told on several occasion by young girls in places you'd liked to have frequented as a younger man that you are too old to be there is soul destroying.

    Did you know that you create your own reality? Have you heard that?

    I’m going to stop here because I could (yet I have no desire to) spend my entire day, picking at each bit of the arguments you’re presenting here. The bottom line is you create your own reality and this is the reality that you are continuing to create for yourself. “You get what you think about, whether you want it or not.” If you don’t want this, then you will want to start thinking about other, different things. Since you’re really not clear about how to go about it and since you haven’t really brought any piece of these teachings into either of your discussions, a good first step would be to educate yourself about these teachings so that we might have the helpful conversation that you’re wanting to have.
    Last edited by WellBeing; 08-15-2016 at 05:20 PM. Reason: Formatting

  6. #6
    Neyo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2014
    Location
    Argentina
    Posts
    268
    I could specify so many false premises you're having, but I'm sure you'd keep arguing for your limitations.
    I'm also in my 30s, and according to statistics, have had much less men in my life than the average woman. The truth is that I don't know what is meant by "the average woman", nor does the reality of others affect my life whatsoever.

    You cannot turn back time, but it also true that while you're sitting here, regetfully mourning over your "wasted" past, time keeps marching on. It's not the reality that is holding you back from experiencing what you want, it's your beliefs.
    Last edited by Neyo; 08-15-2016 at 05:01 PM. Reason: Typo

  7. #7
    Super Moderator WellBeing's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Posts
    14,981
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Sigh and must my posts be saged?
    I'm only guessing what you're asking here, but if you are composing a long reply, it is best to do it in some other software or app rather than here on the Forum, because there are many ways that our connexions to the Forum can get interrrupted. When our connexions to the Forum get interrupted, our works-in-progress disappear with our Forum connexions.

    The most reliable work-around for this is to draft your lengthy reply in a separate text-editing software and app and then copy-and-paste your composition into the Forum software. Then you only need tweak the formatting (to make your post look just the way you want it), which is a quick process and typically not subject to the connexion issue. However, if there should happen to be a disruption in your connexion to the Forum, you'll still have a copy of your draft, so all is not lost.

    Hope that helps.

  8. #8
    Super Kitty Marc's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tempe, Arizona, USA
    Posts
    9,458
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Clearly I have come here for help and because I've read Ask & It is Given (a year ago yes but I intend to reread it), and so to discuss within that framework my issues which I find difficult to bring in line with the Abe teachings. Isn't one of the reasons this forum exists is to help people?
    If this discussion is going to continue, your job is to read our responses and digest them, rather than immediately dismissing them and restating where you are. We're happy to give you suggestions, but you've got to have the willingness to apply what we're suggesting. We're not here to debate you. If you're not willing to do that, this conversation will be a short one.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Marc it's not just thoughts, it's experience.
    But experience is simply practiced thought. When you change the thought, the experience changes too. That's the essential core of what Abraham teaches. I get that at this point you don't ACCEPT it yet, but you've got to be willing to entertain that premise in theory, at least.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I don't know where these guys who are in their 30s hooking up with girls a decade or more younger than themselves are from,
    You've already encountered some here who have shared their experiences, but you've already dismissed them. That's very important because it's more evidence that what you want is out there, but you're holding it away from you. The other piece of it is this -- are there are many people and situations that can satisfy what you're looking for, but because you're placing artificial limits on what you think is possible, you block them. For example, you declare that every woman over a specific age must be looking for a serious relationship, and therefore that means the only options are women and situations who would find you unacceptable. Now neither of those things are true. Not every woman past a certain age is looking for a serious relationshp, nor would every woman at a particular age would reject you. Those are self-imposed limits, not intrinsic truths.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    but where I'm from it's socially unacceptable, it also doesn't feel right to me anymore because I'm no longer a young man.
    Well, the whole "it doesn't feel right to me" is something under your control. It's also evidence that your Inner Being doesn't agree with your perspective. In other words, the negative emotion you're feeling is the thing you're doing that's blocking what you want from coming. It's you imprisoning yourself.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Furthermore to be told on several occasion by young girls in places you'd liked to have frequented as a younger man that you are too old to be there is soul destroying.
    Perhaps, but it's not any different than going to a restaurant, ordering something you detest just because it exists, and the then receiving that dish you detest. Sure it's unpleasant, but you only received it because that's what you ordered. As I mentioned before, it's simply a case of repeated thought turning into experience. Change your repeated thought and your experience will change.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I'm not making these things up they are now my experience. Not only is it no longer socially acceptable for me to try to hook up with young girls, I no longer have social access to places where people in their young 20s go.
    Again, are you experiencing it? Sure. But are you still making it up? Yes. If you were to feel differently, you'd have a different experience in the same way that if you go to a restaurant and order something different from what you ordered last time, no matter how many times you ordered that previous dish, they will still serve you NOW what you order NOW.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    What I'm writing must sound aweful to some of the ladies here, but just to be clear it applies as much to women as it does men, it's not a hard and fast rule but young women should be messing around with young men in their prime while they are young. The reason I have so much trouble with it and would like very much to experience young women is only because I missed out on that, not because I have some obsession with young girls, this sense of urgency occurred to me aged 29 not before and there are plenty of attractive older women but they experienced life and not stunted development when it comes to relationships.
    You can keep making up reasons why you can't have what you want, but they're still made up reasons.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    You mention inner being, well I can tell you that when I think thoughts of ending my life I start to feel at peace, so does that mean my IB is agreeing with me?
    In the sense that your IB sees relief to your self-imposed suffering? Sure, it agrees with that. Does that mean you have to croak to achieve that relief? No.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Rather than the utter grief I have by realising I missed out on my youth, and this means a lot more than just relationships.
    And that "utter grief" you're feeling is your Inner Being NOT agreeing with your contention that you've missed out on what you're reaching for. If it did, it would not feel like grief. It would feel like joy.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I cannot see how I can fulfill my desires as a young man in his prime since the key is being a young man in his prime which I no longer am.
    That's simply because the "prime" you're describing was never about age. Take Olympian Michael Phelps, who is 31 and just won 5 gold medals and a silver medal in the Rio Olympics. He's 31, but does that age somehow mean he's not in his prime? There are many who will argue that he's better now than he ever was. That's because it's never really about youth. You, and others, simply use use as a proxy for what you think it MEANS. They're separate things.

    Now, that said, I accept that from where you stand, you can't see how you can fulfill your desires. That's just fine. It's like standing in Phoenix, wanting to be in San Diego, and saying that from where you stand in Phoenix you can't see where the beach is. That's absolutely true, but it's a very shallow truth. You have the ability to close that physical gap, and as you get closer and closer to your destination, all of that stuff you can't see now is revealed. It's the same thing when we talk about vibration. You can't see how you'll fulfill your desires, but frankly, that's really not your job at this point. All you have to do is to start feeling BETTER, and as you get closer to your desires, you'll be able to see more and more.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    It is not just my belief it is now the reality I'm coming across, it's socially unacceptable for me to be hitting on girls who are a decade or more younger than me, I am coming across objections from people.
    Yes, it IS just your belief. The evidence you're encountering is the actualization of that repeated thought/vibration. That's all belief is. When that belief changes, your experience will change too.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    To tell me I'm the creator is to tell me that I can plant corn in autumn and expect it to grow ready for Winter, I'm now in the Autumn period of my life regarding young women and you expect me to start planting?
    If you want to continue insisting that you're in unstoppable decline, that's just fine. You're here asking us, so I'm here suggesting that it's not autumn, even though you insist to the contrary. I'm suggesting that, even if you were literally talking about weather and corn, and you still wanted corn, corn is easy to obtain. Even if you insist on growing the corn yourself despite the fact that you could just go down to the store and get corn that's ready for you now, it's really not that difficult to grow corn whenever and wherever you are. Even if that means building a greenhouse and getting grow lights or hydroponics, or heating or whatever else you'd need, you can still grow corn if that's what you want.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Surely then accepting that the boat was missed and sailed and that I won't be able to experience young girls just as all my peers did (and I mean this socially as well), might at least give me some peace?
    No, it never will. You'll never be able to focus on the impossibility of your desire and feel peace.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Rather than teasing myself that I can have something that's gone and prolonging my suffering.
    Or, you could just stop insisting that what you want is gone.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Perhaps then instead of grief I can have a little sadness, that's slightly higher up on the vibrational chart, no?
    To me, grief and sadness are essentially interchangeable. Now if you were to move up to ANGER instead of wallowing in powerlessness, now you're starting to achieve some control over how you feel.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    You are right I probably wouldn't, because I feel I missed the boat and it would cause me additional mental suffering.

    If I was 25 maybe I could change this circumstance but I really don't see how I can fulfill it now.

    I try to be grateful I really do, I've tried the things in the book, I know the book is right, and while yes I could probably get to a better place in life, I still feel anything now would be 2nd rate and past it.
    Well, if that's the case, we don't have much to talk about, do we? Fortunately, it's not. It's really not necessary to see how you can fulfill your desires right now. All you have to do is be willing to feel BETTER anyway. If you're willing to that, you'll start making your way. Like Abraham's often talked about journey from Phoenix to San Diego, all you have to do is point in the right direction and keep going and you'll get there. It's the same thing emotionally/vibrationally.

    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I'm trying to apply it marc, but I just don't see how, it's like asking me to walk on water. The odds are against me, I'm not in the prime of my youth wanting to experience the prime of my youth. I know the Abe material will tell me to change my thoughts to change my beliefs but that's nigh on impossible from what I've experienced, because ageing is a reality that no one can run away from.
    You're substituting youth for "primeness" and while it's true that much of our culture feeds into your false beliefs, primeness and youth are separate things. You can experience being in your PRIME at any age. That's what ALIGNMENT is about. The "prime" of youth you're yearning for is a cheap substitute for alignment. But the only way you're going to discover the truth of that is to actually be willing to feel better. In other words, what you're reaching for is RELIEF from your relentless story of how you're NOT in your prime. That's absolutely something you can accomplish. You won't accomplish it all at once, but it's something you CAN accomplish.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    The Abe teachings seem to do little about dealing with the past or past desires since they presume they are all irrelevant you are only present, yet our past is with us of this there is no doubt, I can't lie to myself about it.
    That's because if your desire were really a "past" desire and it were not something you wanted anymore, not having it wouldn't be something that felt bad. For example, maybe there's a toy you wanted as a child that you didn't get. Does not having that toy now torture you still? Of course not. The desires you're talking about aren't past, they're still current desires. You're just using the fact that you haven't gotten them yet as your excuse to keep yourself out of alignment NOW.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    Even when I don't want anything anymore even then I can't stop suffering, living a life filled with regret and illness.
    If it were true that you didn't want anything anymore, then not having it wouldn't hurt. You can't stop wanting what you want. If you're going to be happy, you're going to have to stop insisting that you can't have what you want. There's just no way to keep doing what you're doing and get a different outcome.
    Quote Originally Posted by sailorboat View Post
    I'm going for therapy have been depressed for a long time now, whether I think thoughts or not, emotionally I feel unwell all the time.
    That's because you've trained your vibration into this particular place and it doesn't take any effort to stay where you are. Nonetheless, you do have the ability to focus yourself into better feeling places. The difference is that you've got to care enough about how you feel that you're willing to feel better even though things haven't changed. As long as whatever subject is more important than feeling better, you're going to keep suffering. How much longer are you going to keep insisting that you're not where you're supposed to be when THAT'S what is causing your suffering?

  9. #9
    Interesting and inciteful, Cuddly.
    Strange because you/I/we etc. must have layers of desires from years past, and today! Three years ago I wanted a pool and a certain modern house.....has not yet happened. now I have scratched this area as I hate it and don't thrive in the culture.
    Focus on the new fresh desires, I think, I think I'm there with you.
    Maybe the old desires are in the way of anything new and fresh happening. Maybe that's some secret, to clear the slate and start anew?! in trying to manifest a car, I must have 150 different models and colors in there that I wanted, so far I do not have one.
    Maybe this is a way of keeping things simple?? I saved a shopping cart a few days ago, an online store, and now it's changed, I don't need apple cider vinegar. Maybe this is similar to holding onto many months or years of things you wanted but never got. I don't know.



    Quote Originally Posted by cuddly View Post
    wow....interesting title of the thread...it suddenly reminded me that all my desires on my list,one after one,some of them with some delays,but all of them were fullfilled-fate even took me thousands of kilometres to fullfill some of them.........now i have a different problem:dealing with the past and my fullfilled desires from the past....yes,its a problem...cuz now i have new desires and those old ones are already aging and out of date for me....i try to focus on my new desires,on these fresh ones,but my old desires-these fullfilled ones seem to be in the way...is appreciating old desires and focusing on them an obstacle?.....to create new reality?....does it cause continuing status quo?
    Last edited by intheclouds; 08-15-2016 at 10:27 PM.

  10. #10
    Super Kitty Marc's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Tempe, Arizona, USA
    Posts
    9,458
    Quote Originally Posted by cuddly View Post
    is appreciating old desires and focusing on them an obstacle?.....to create new reality?....does it cause continuing status quo?
    No, finding appreciation for something is never an obstacle. After all, the only reason you ever want ANYTHING is because you think you'll feel better in having it. If you find ways to feel GENUINE appreciation, now you're a match to all those other things that are a match to appreciation.
    Quote Originally Posted by intheclouds View Post
    I feel the same way Sailorboat, really bogged down almost like carrying emotional and physical weights because something you wanted years ago never happened.
    Years ago, I wanted to go to Iceland for Christmas, 5 or 10 years ago, I thought of this recently, and this felt so crummy, I never got to go. I was almost sick to my stomach, like what a cruel God.
    Except that God isn't the one determining what comes to you, YOU are. As Abraham says, when you ask, it is given. It's simply a matter of lining up with what you want. This year, Abraham talked to a woman who wanted a large sum of money so that she could travel. Abraham explained that what she's doing vibrationally is saying that she needs to be on the trip before she can start enjoying it. The key, Abraham explained, is that she had to find a way to start enjoying the trip even though the money hadn't come yet. That's quite literally the exact situation you're describing. You want the trip to happen first so you can enjoy it, but instead you're feeling crummy. That's why the trip isn't here. You've got to find a way to start enjoying that trip even though the way to take the trip hasn't come yet.
    Quote Originally Posted by intheclouds View Post
    There has got to be some way to just clear the slate somehow, and not carry around all these disappointments from the past. I wonder how you do that, as it seems if you are disappointed you will attract MORE disappointment??
    That's EXACTLY how it works. That's why we've been telling you repeatedly that you're not going to yearn your way to what you want. You've got to feel BETTER without the conditions changing.
    Quote Originally Posted by intheclouds View Post

    I love this Cuddly "I try to focus on my new desires, on these fresh ones"
    Every day it seems should be a new slate. Just because I treaded on bad luck for a while, doesn't mean it can't turn around!
    Maybe the thoughts you think, keep going into the vortex, over years as Esther says. You keep filling the vortex with your thoughts. Maybe this trip to Iceland to swim for Christmas could come true still! There wasn't money so I couldn't afford to go. I had nothing to do, and stayed at home peniless for Christmas, that time I don't think I visited friends or family, spent it alone, in my horrible shoebox apartment in the city, instead of swimming in this beautiful sea in Iceland, so the disappointment is there and pungent.
    You've just explained the vibrational gap between where you are (horrible shoebox apartment w/ pungent disappointment) versus where you want to be (happy, swimming in a beautiful sea in Iceland). It's your constant pushing against where you are that keeps you from going in the direction of what you want.
    Quote Originally Posted by intheclouds View Post

    Maybe universe is confused.
    Maybe all these layers are really confusing?????
    The Universe isn't confused, the Universe is responding precisely to what you're focused upon: all the things you don't like about where you are and your awareness of what you don't have. LOA doesn't give you what you WANT (although your IB certainly is focused on what you want), it gives you what you think about/are focused on. LOA isn't confused, you're focused on what you don't want, which is precisely what you're experiencing. You're just wanting LOA to work like a complaints box, where if you just raise enough of a ruckus it will give you what you want. The problem is that it cannot and will not ever work that way.

    Now how do you change all of that? By trying to feel BETTER about where you are, even if that's just a little "less crappy." This isn't rocket science.

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •