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Thread: The work, make progress in my emotions using Emotional Guidance System - step by step

  1. #211
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Jun 2016
    Quote Originally Posted by WellBeing View Post
    I wasn't talking about "before your parts" or on-stage or in the performance space. I was talking about on here, in your thread. Focusing on why you love what you love about what you've chosen to do HAS TO feel better than focusing on what dissatisfied you about your rehearsal.
    But only when it's in the vicinity of that.
    Quote Originally Posted by WellBeing View Post
    On-stage? No, I can't imagine that it has shifted because you've practiced a very different momentum and that different momentum will win out . You can't overcome that different momentum that you've been practicing some 12 (?) hours a day with 5 minutes of focusing on what you love and why you love it, especially when you're in an environment full of reminders of your different, unwanted momentum. You're already out of the airplane without a parachute. You can't, right now, claw your way up air back into the plane.
    I heard Abraham saying on the MLOA CD that when you shift your vibration from a point to another, you don't have to do that ever again.

    And, and I don't do this here to disagree with you for the purpose of disagreeing with you but to show you what I learned by Abraham (and here in the Forum): When I am at home, and my rehearsal or the actual play is coming tomorrow, and I work on the fear thoughts, than there is no momentum, because I haven't activated that thought/vibration until I decided to work on that (and I don't feel any of the negative emotion at home, not even close) or until it "manifests" when I am on stage.

    And, when I am on fear, and I heard you say that on the thread here, I can't jump from here to there, so I don't even consider to talk about what I love/like about being on stage, because that is tooo far away from fear and my job is to find something that feels better and feels like relief because that it the "order of business" and because it feels better. To be honest that suprises me so hard how what I understand differs so much from what is written, because it isn't that hard to read that.

    Quote Originally Posted by WellBeing View Post
    Have fun!

    I swear I do this conversation to learn and not to disagree what you write.

  2. #212
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    Jun 2016
    I was told beforehand, that I can onlyparticipate in this production, when I have time then and then. And Iwas told that I will play all the time on stage and that the castwouldn't change, because the director wants to see always the samepeople, whenever that is possible and only when someone is ill shouldbe replaced for that time. And now I get told, that another one willsometimes play at my position. I planned that so hard and had so muchtrouble with the job departement and now they come up with this.

    • Now she puts someone else in my position on the play after the premiere and he isn't even a back up for me, but for another person. I don't get it. Why me?
    • I am one of the most reliable persons there and attending 99 % of all rehearsals and get treated like this.
    • When she wants something from me she can ask long. I won't help her.
    • It makes me so tired to put so much energy in this and then get treated like this.
    • She should learn how to do her job right and not to please everyone (the other emergency replacement actors). She should follow instructions by the dirctor and don't fool around.
    • I mean, I will play most of the performances, so that's the pro, but not all, like it was said to me in the casting and the arrangement.
    • I can understand her, that she wants that guy to play sometimes, because he will not disapoint him.
    • I haven't have so much responsibility for a role and never played even solo parts with the professional actors, so that play is definitely an improvement in what I have done before.
    • And that month, I will get so much money out of things I love like never before. That will be my biggest month at the theatre, ever. There was a time I couldn't even thing about the theatre to visit until I would be old and now I am playing with the profs and get paid for it. Awesome.
    • I am still the main cast.
    • I have so many performances in this, that I can surely give one or two away. That gives me the opportunity to see the performance by myself instead of playing on the stage.

  3. #213
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Jun 2016
    Everywhere I feel the lack of women.It doesn't matter where I am. With EVERYTHING Ido. I can't take a single CLEAR thought without noticing the lack ofwomen. When they are around they are my center of attention (or thelack of). I can't talk to a women without feeling the lack of women.

    1. I know, that my feelings are sole a product of my thoughts.
    2. I have control over my thoughts.
    3. Ich have learned, that I can feel, if the thought I am thinking is more in alignment with my Inner Being, that is always focused upon the wanted end, or if I am focusing into the opposite direction.
    4. I see, that I am not ALWAYS feeling terrible awful about women.
    5. And I see, that I see women everyday. I see, everyday, women, that are attractive to me. Dozens of women, everyday. One prettier than the other, one more interesting than the other.
    6. I have many things in my life, I can try focus my thoughts on and I remember a time when I did it for a pretty long time. I took a lot of practice, but it worked.
    7. I know that doesn't last very long, because the momentum of the lack of women is dominant, but it is possible for a short period of time.
    8. I even can't change that lack with my thoughts, but I can change the feeling of lack step by step with my thoughts.
    9. Indeed, my IB WANTS that I come into alignment with women, because that feels better. But I am where I am and that is totally fine. I can't get it wrong: Either I feel better, or I expand my Inner Being with more RoD.
    10. I like knowing that it is getting better and better, and that this is the natural direction of the universe.
    11. I like having everything I need to change my focus towards the feeling of having women.
    12. I like that, because that focus feels much much better.
    13. I like that, because that improves my overall feeling a lot.
    14. I like having these Teachings to feel better.
    15. I like that I can FEEL the feeling of HAVING women without actually have women.
    16. I like, how that is possible.
      I like, that I don't have to raise my vibration all at once.
      I like, that I have unlimited tries to find BFTs about that topic.
      I like, that at some point, I will genuily FEEL the HAVING of the women.
      I like that other people prove to me that this is possible.

  4. #214
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Jun 2016
    I can't stop to think about the lack of women.

    1. I can't do a step, can't take ANY action without thinking about women.
    2. All my experiences are dimished by my dominant thougths about women.
    3. I really would wish to have easy thoughts about women like other guys do.
    4. Why this has to happen to me, I can't believe that this burden is on me.
    5. I know nobody will believe me seeing me happy and being with women, but I will prove them wrong. They will see and not believe their eyes.
    6. I mean, how long do I have to carry this with me? It's been so long and I often don't see any light at the end of the tunnel.
    7. Why the heck my parents haven't teached me being more independent with women from the begining?
    8. If I ever get this done? To be honest it is taking me so long that I can't see it now.
    9. I really have thought that I could solve this more easily and with more fun and in faster time.
    10. It's really prickling me that it takes that long to find a more enjoyable experience here.
    11. Really, I don't life forever (in this body).
    12. Oh man, it's so frustrating to be still in this position.
    13. Well, sometimes I can't take my focus of from the lack of women for a very short time.
    14. It really does not last very long and then it gets back to the lack, but there are some times where I can breath a bit better.
    15. I mean, I like women, but I don't like the feeling of lack.
    16. I like women.
    17. I like that they are around and enriching my experience.
    18. Wouldn't it be nice if I would be more independent from women?
    19. Wouldn't it be nice to feel more ease while thinking about women?
    20. Wouldn't it be nice to have a better feeling relationship with women?
    21. Wouldn't it be nice if that would be a "topic" with positive emotions like my favorite computergame?
    22. Wouldn't it be nice to feel as good around with the thoughts of women as I feel about cute dogs and cute cats?
    23. Wouldn't it be nice to feel around women as I have felt about them when I was only 12 years old (and when that didn't bothered me)?
    24. Wouldn't it be nice if my source of my Well Being is in my own thoughts instead of outer things like women?
    25. I like that I can direct my focus towards being interested in women only.
    26. I like that I can have talks with women just because to talk.
    27. I like that other persons can that to so that must mean with practise I can to that, too.
    28. I like that I can only focus on the positive aspects of the women and let the interaction evolve on its own into whatever direction.

    EDIT: Hm, I say that I have glimpses of better feelings but because I am now focused on the opposite I think that I focused on this work again on the outcome and not on the feeling. ergh.
    EDIT2: And that is good to know, so I can figure out why this is focused on the outcome instead of the feeling.

  5. #215
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Jun 2016
    I don't know how this should go on fromjanuary and how I will earn money from then with the things I lovedoing. There is no arrangement from january and I don't want do workI hate. (worry)

    • Until now I had some periods of strong worry but I always found a way (more precise: a way found ME) to live my life mainly on my terms.
    • But I can't see how that could proceed.
    • I have some time until january.
    • I always had some "coincidences" that led to money.
    • A friend XYZ was in a similar position with the job dep. And she found a way now to free herself of them after a long time.
    • So it is possible to be free of that job dep.
    • I don't have to find a way, I only have to feel better.
    • My income increased steadily over the year.
    • I will earn so much money in december like never before with my theatre work.
    • That is over in january, but maybe that lead to something more secure for me.
    • I really would like to have an secure income, where I can focus on other things.
    • I like to feel secure.
    • I like to know that money comes in and that I can even save something for things I like, because I like spending money often.
    • I never could imagine to live in a flat and finally I got one. So it IS possible for things that seemed impossible for years to happen.
    • I know this is all lined up for me.
    • I like knowing that the LoA will orchestrate circumstances that brings me what I want.
    • I know that there is a buffer of time and that I first have to feel the security of money, until it will come.
    • I can do feel better about money.
    • Indeed, 99 % of all creations are done vibrationally.
    • So, I won't see the evidence in my surroundings for a time, but I can focus on the feeling of it even now.
    • Other people have done so, and I think of myself that I can do that, too.

  6. #216
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Jun 2016
    Lets do it again, making feeling better the intention. Start thought: "I always think about how I can seduce a women/how to overcome fear to act/what action to take, to ask her out (what should I say, etc.) and how I can't do that and how that makes me feel depressed that this will never work"
    1. I am so unsure if I will ever be able to do that. I want to do that by my own but that never worked and that makes me feel insecure, if I am able to do that in the future. (insecure)
    2. There are guys who changed this piece forever through action. I learned, that life is mainly created by thought, not by action (and that action is "only" the result of the current vibration and in "alignment" with the current vibration), so I would really love to be able do to that through my thoughts, like they did that with so much action. I mean, why can't it work "my" way when they even can do it the "hard" action based way? (jealousy)
    3. Oh man, he just go to the women I am looking at for weeks, months! And he makes out a date, kisses her in front of me and "get what he wants". I can't say how much I hate this.
    4. Based on these Teachings he is in alignment with what he wants. Also, he looks like he is having fun even without women. So that makes perfectly sense in the view of the Teachings. So he is feeling/focusing on the having end of the stick. He is feeling it, and I can get there, too.
    5. I can feel easy about women, when I get to the feeling place of it, without actually changing the conditions.
    6. That is definitely a place I can go to with my thoughts in time.
    7. That is everything I want and I can see that I can accomplish that.
    8. running out of thoughts

  7. #217
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    Jun 2016
    I felt definetely something different

    Start:I am feeling shit without women.

    1. I have now women on some occasions with whom I can talk and feel at least more relaxed than usual.
    2. Not focusing on women can help me focusing more on other people and to make new friendships that wouldn't become because I wouldn't talk to them because of thinking of women all the time.
    3. When I am thinking about other things in my life there is some air time off thinking about women.
    4. When I don't focus on having sex with a women, I usually end up in a more deep conversation than if I would look for sex all the time.
    5. I know that I can't continue to think in the way I did nearly 10 years now, because that made my life really shitty.
    6. When I will do my first new thoughts steps, LoA will help me bringing me more.
    7. That is the pro site: The law helps me to bring me more thoughts of what I am focusing on.
    8. I know that this works like this because it is a LAW.
    9. Maybe someday I will eventually feel really calm about women. I did that before with my flat – I felt depressed not having one, and then I somehow learned to be ok with living with my parents (what took some time but ok) for so long and then***pop*** after feeling good with it I got a call from the apartement company. And since then there was no turning back.
    10. There is a lot of thought work to do, but it is possible.
    11. Someday I will laugh about this, and I have plenty of lifetime ahead of me.
    12. A men once said, a wise one, that his life first began with his 50. birthday, because then he found the Law Of Attraction and started living conscious. Before that it was a foreplay for him. That is what he said.
    13. I am sure I will get this until then, I am still sooo young.
    14. There is sooo much time.
    15. I have the knowledge, I have the books, I attracted this informations, and I will put it into practise and feel better and better.
    16. I now can see how this could work out.
    17. I will focus more on the personality of the women, because that is a thing I can do right now.
    18. I will meet so many wonderful people and get to know the women I already meet in my day. This time I will focus on them and just relax in the conversation.

    Want:I feel Contentment being without women.

  8. #218
    Super Moderator WellBeing's Avatar
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    Oct 2008
    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    I can't see how what you are talking about differs from my approach: I do the work to feel in that situation, where I normally feel fear, something else, something better.

    Let’s come at this from a different angle and let’s see if we.can get any clearer for you.

    So when we say “feel better,” we mean “right now.” Right now, in this very moment. Like when you're posting on the Forum.

    We also mean “compared to what you were just feeling in that moment just before.”

    Now, if you notice, you're doing your “work” so that you can feel better the next time you put yourself in that situation. Can you see the difference there?

    You object to focusing upon the reasons you want to do your singing because you can't see how that will change your next (or future) rehearsal experience. I didn't asking you to focus in that way so that your next (or future) rehearsal experience will change. I asked you to focus on the reasons you want to do your singing because focusing on something that you do want HAS TO feel better than focusing on what you don't want, because your IB is always focusing on your wanted aspects of whatever you focus upon. So, when you shift your focus from your unwanted aspects of any topic towards your wanted aspects of any topic, you are moving your focus into greater alignment with the perspective of your IB. When you move your focus into greater alignment with the perspective of your IB on any topic, you feel better. That's what that “better” means: you have shifted your focus into greater alignment with the perspective of your IB.

    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    Quote Originally Posted by WellBeing View Post
    I wasn't talking about "before your parts" or on-stage or in the performance space. I was talking about on here, in your thread. Focusing on why you love what you love about what you've chosen to do HAS TO feel better than focusing on what dissatisfied you about your rehearsal.
    But only when it's in the vicinity of that.
    If you stay on the same topic, I would agree with you. If you were to try to jump from “People are watching me when I have the stage to myself and I feel nervous and fearful because I’m afraid I’ll mess up in front of them and they’ll think badly of me” to “I own the stage. When I’m up there, my whole being fills that stage and I project myself confidently and clearly. I forget about everyone else,” I would agree with you. You won’t find relief in that approach.

    But what I suggested was that you shift your focus to another topic, where you would be able to find your relief more easily. I had asked to shift your focus from your performance at your rehearsal and “staying in front of people alone on stage” (which is one subject) to what you like about singing (which is an entirely different subject altogether). When you switch topics like that, you are also switching your practiced momentum and switching your practiced PoA. Then, with that different momentum and that different PoA, you might find your relief simply from that shift. (This is why we often advise people to think about bubbles, cute puppies, fluffy bunnies or to take a nap or meditate.) Furthermore, you might be able to practice that better-feeling momentum. As I pointed out in your Teachings thread last week, when Abraham (and we) recommend to others to “feel better,” we simply mean “better,” not “better on that particular issue” (although that is definitely possible with this material and these tools).

    I love to sing. I love that I can make all these wonderful tones and notes and sounds with my body. I love that I’ve learned some skills that so many others simply dream about. I love how I feel when I allow the music to flow through my body. I love what I bring to the music. I love that I can take these beautiful, exquisitely crafted songs and with my unique body and my unique talents and unique experience, I can enhance and transform that beautiful song into something more. Something that no one has ever heard before. I love how I become part of the music. I love that, in this way, I can personally experience the co-creation that Abraham are always talking about. I love how my heart soars. I love how the music--even “sad” music--can uplift me with its beauty. I love how I can uplift others with my song….

    HAS GOT TO feel better than this:
    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    Some rehearsals today and beforehand I worked (at least I tried) on my thoughts about "staying in front of people alone on stage", because on the one hand I love that, on the other hand I try to avoid that situation because I feel so terrible while doing that, and, because I knew that I would have to perform in front of all the professional actors. Extreme negative emotion.

    So when the situation came up I felt so terrible. And then the director said, that I could be more "brave" in my thing and an actor said, that the reason, because I wasn't so brave is because of all the people watching proably (said to the director). And that was to the point. I was thinking (I think): "I am soooo insecure in my skin, that it's no wonder that I can't interact with all the really confident actors and that they don't even watch me into my eyes and stuff. I make tooo much out of what everybody is thinking about me.I hope I don't screw this up."
    1. I know that my Inner Being doesn't follow agree with that thoughts.
    2. I have practised those thoughts for many years, thoughts which feel really degrading. I know, that this is now the case and that this was the case for many years. I am where I am. And by recognizing the thoughts I am now finally in that position, to take care of myself and to free myself from that negative thoughts and to allow my Inner Being.
    3. I know, that this are only thoughts, nothing more, that only thoughts are responsible for the way I am feeling. That is a reliefing insight.
    4. I am very I am. I can't run away from this situation right now, but of course I have on the long term the desire to free myself from these negative thoughts.
    5. Of course it makes me angry, that I am such an outwards oriented guy, who made myself depending on outer things for how I feel. By that I thought more and more negative thoughts about myself that now are feelable.
    6. Yeah, I will show you, those people, who told me, to be more brave and who have seen me as a small little guy who fears nearly everything. You will see how I will take over my own life and take back my power!
    7. I can't understand why it came so far. Why nobody didn't teached more healthy thoughts? All those situations now could be prevented.
    8. It is really protracted, that I have to take care about these things. How long should that go on?

    I hope that his a thougt I can work on, the "what people think of me" because "I feel so insecure now" is not very workable.
    When I asked my refocusing question, (after you ran for the hills for a few days) you replied
    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    I have done that before (to focus on the reason why I am going through this feeling before my solo parts) but that feeling hasn't shifted. That sounds nice to think that (I love that because...), but (and I don't talk doing the work 5 minutes before the rehearsal) the feeling at the rehearsal remained the same. [Emphasis mine.]

    (I don't want to flog a dead horse but I've highlighted the bit where you ARE doing your “work” to fix your rehearsal experience, rather than to feel better right now. But I don’t want to continue to flog that dead horse.

    And if it “sounds nice to think that,” then you haven’t yet found the feeling of relief. Instead, you seem to be going through the motions, playing “Abraham’s silly game” rather than the “feeling better” that I’ve been recommending to you.)

    In your reply (and elsewhere in recent posts) you have hinted at how you can’t see how this approach to feeling better is going to improve your rehearsal experience. I can’t tell you how it will unfold for you. That’s your creation. But it doesn’t take a lot of imagination on my part to see how a Forum friend in your situation [ETA: could] eventually practice himself into a momentum of Love for singing that could be more dominant than the momentum of “What are they thinking of me?” so that when he steps onto that stage alone, he’ll more readily focus on his Love and Joy in singing to such an extent that he won’t have time or the desire to focus on “What are they thinking of me?”

    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    I heard Abraham saying on the MLOA CD that when you shift your vibration from a point to another, you don't have to do that ever again.

    To me, this is a very telling comment. When you shift your vibration from point to another in the way that Abraham teach us, you are shifting your vibration in such a way that feels better. So, if it does feel better and you know how to do that “feel better,” then why would it matter to you whether you would have to do that ever again?

    You’ve heard me say this to you before: why isn’t your attitude “This?! Don’t even trip, dawg. I got this. I know how to do this and I know that I feel relief when I do this.”?

    You will never get it done. You are an eternal being. There’s always something more for you--for all of us--to shift. And that’s good news because shifting feels like relief (unless we humans turn it into some kind of “work”).

    To speak to your comment directly, yes, you will have shifted that piece of your vibration in a new way. You don’t have to shift that piece in that way again. But you’re always expanding. There’s more pieces of your vibration (even on the same topic) to shift. I find this morsel of these teachings helpful to remember when I mistakenly tell myself how I’ve shifted this “same” thing “a million times.” I really haven’t. I may have shifted that piece and then that piece and then this piece and then that first piece and then this other piece over here and…. When I remember this morsel, I can see how all those previous shifts were different, rather than my inaccurate idea of “same.”

    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    EDIT: I am not doing this here to annoy you, but you sure know that.

    This is important.

    Not only do I know that, I also know that EVERY emotion that I feel (including annoyance, which I’m not feeling, FWIW) is my creation. My emotions have NOTHING to do with anyone else. No one has the ability to “annoy” me or “make me happy” or….

    And I’m not saying that because I’m some awesome guru (I’m not). I’m saying that because I understand what Abraham teach me about my emotions. My emotions are ONLY about the relationship between what I (in my physical body) am doing with my vibration and what my IB is doing with its vibration in that same moment about that same topic. As you can see, there is no one else in that equation. My emotions are always about me and Me. No one else.

    I'll let you continue with your art of allowing.
    Last edited by WellBeing; 10-24-2017 at 06:40 PM.

  9. #219
    Super Moderator WellBeing's Avatar
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    Oct 2008
    So, if I haven't thoroughly chased you off of your own thread, let's try this from yet a different angle. I'm going to explain this yet-a-different-angle by putting some words in your mouth, pretending I'm doing "my" work:

    "I've been doing my data collection and, in doing so, seeing all the topics that I 'need' to 'work' on, it's really overwhelming me. There are so many incidents and so many strong feelings. And I'm told that I'm doing my 'work' to fix those (and future) incidents and I can feel how I get stuck in the specifics of those incidents.

    "So, I've heard Abraham. I've heard them say 'Get as specific as I can as long as it feels good. If not, go general.' Well, this stuff that I've been 'working' on really doesn't feel any form of good. So, that's my cue to go general. Now, I don't know how I can go general about all of this stuff. I can step back and step back but it still seems a lot. But if I keep stepping back and stepping back with my focus, I can get to the point where I can see that ALL of this is because I'm really, really concerned about what people are thinking about me. I'm concerned about what women are thinking about me, about what colleagues are thinking about me, about what directors are thinking about me, about what officials are thinking about me, etc., etc. A more general way of saying this is 'I'm concerned about what people are thinking about me.'

    "Why would I be concerned about what they are thinking about me? Well, that's easy. It's because I believe that their opinions of me will have important consequences for me that I don't want and I don't think that I can really do anything about those consequences. They might not date me or they might not hire me or they might not give me my benefits or...or...or.... That's all real. I'm right to be worried or frustrated or afraid of these things.

    "Ugh! I can already feel my negative emotion starting to well up, so let's not continue down that road.

    "Let me step back into these teachings once again. I know that the LoA brings us more of what we focus upon. I've heard Abraham say that. I've heard them on the Forum say that. That's what the LoA does. OK. So, let me use my logic here. Now, WB has been telling me that I've been doing my 'work' to fix my problems. I don't really see that. But maybe I can see how my posts have largely been about 'stuff' I don't want. So, as I've been doing my 'work' in that fashion, I've been focusing on that 'stuff' (that I don't want). So, as I've been doing that, the LoA has been responding to my focus. That's the Law.

    "Abraham tells us that every subject is really two subjects--that stick with two ends. Here, the ends of this stick might be 'people's negative judgments about me' and people's positive judgments about me.' And, yeah, there's a whole range in between. So, does everyone make negative judgments about me? Well, I really think that most people do but is that truly the case? I mean, I've written in some of my posts that I don't know what this one is thinking. Do I believe that? Yeah, I guess if I had to swear on my life, I might grudgingly agree to that. But in my heart of hearts, I really think that a lot of people are critical of me. I have evidence and no amount of words is going to make that evidence go away.

    "Wait a minute. Lemme think. The LoA brings us more of what we focus upon. I wonder... If I start to focus more upon the people who aren't criticizing me--no matter who they are, doesn't that mean that the LoA will bring to me more people who won't criticize me? I mean, that makes sense, doesn't it?

    "Yeah, but crap, I can't think of anyone who has a good opinion of me. Well, there was that one, but he's in the next town over and I haven't seen him in a year, so who knows what he thinks now? I can hear WB already: 'Yeah, but you knew what he thought a year ago. You can remember that and that memory would feel better than the memory of what happened at the bank this afternoon or in rehearsal yesterday.'

    "But isn't that still trying to fix my problem? Yeah, probably a little bit. I mean, that's always going to be in the back of my mind but if I can get my mind off of the problem (which I am by focusing on someone who wasn't part of the problem) I'm going to be focusing less on the problem, just like if I could focus on the bubbles or cute puppies or fluffy bunnies that they blather on about on the Forum.

    "OK, so I can think about that one guy who had a good opinion of me but I can't think about him all day. I mean, we didn't hang out all that much so I don't have much to remember. Well, wait a minute. There's a Specific-General thing I mentioned above. I've been getting all Specific on things I don't want. I've been making those memories big and bold and colorful and loud in my mind, highlighting in bright lights all the vivid details of those memories. I can do the same thing, but with my memories of that one guy. I can dwell upon and magnify those memories so that I can 'see' all the rich and minute details (or as best I can). I can make our laughter loud and boisterous. After all, I already have those skills. I can use them for my relief, rather than for my anguish.

    "At the same time, I can start to downplay those memories of what I don't want. I can remember them in black-and-white, wash out as much color as possible. I can turn down the volume of the sounds. I can cut them short. I can even make those pictures smaller in my mind (like picture-in-picture on TVs). I can even zoom out so that I'm viewing the shrunken picture-in-picture memory from a far-off distance. After all, those are same skills I've already been using, just in reverse.

    "OK, well, yeah, that might get me a half-hour worth of memory. Boooorrrring. Well, wait a minute. It's a stick. There's stick between those two ends. So, I don't have to find more guys/people at that other end. (And the LoA is probably interfering with my doing that.) I just have to find people who seem to be less critical of me or who are not criticizing me or who are not judging me, who have no opinion about me. That would feel better than focusing upon the people I think are critical of me (even when that person who is critical of me is me). As I do that, the LoA would have to bring to me more people who are less critical of me or who aren't criticizing or judging me or who have no opinion of me. That's the Law. Ahh! There's that trap that WB has been talking about. If I do this to Abe away the people who are criticizing me, I'd still be focusing on people who are criticizing me. So, I have to honestly look for people who aren't judging me or who have no opinion of me. (That means no more looking in the mirror. Haha! Well, I know that my criticisms are bogus because I feel like crap when I think my own self-criticisms. That 'crap' feeling tells me that my IB, who is connected to Infinite Intelligence, has a different opinion than my 'crap' self-criticisms. So, I know--on paper-- Lemme say that better: I've heard that this means that my 'crap' self-criticisms are, therefore, bogus. I wish I could believe that but at least, I've heard that and understand it 'intellectually.')

    "How will I know if I'm 'honestly' looking for people who aren't judging me or who have no opinion of me? Because I will be doing it for the relief I can feel as I look for them or as I remember them. If I'm doing it for any other reason, then I'll know that my intention has slipped towards an unhelpful intention...."

    With that, I promise you I'll leave you alone on your thread and you get back to doing your "work" however you want to do it. It is your Art. And you cannot get it wrong.

  10. #220
    Klassik's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2016
    Thank you!

    I have collected so many thoughts (which causing strong neg. emotion) in the meantime that I will apply what I have now read here to those thoughts.

    That is so much now to quote that all, so I pick a thing I like more clarification: You wrote in the last post about to find a person who don't judge me etc. Then you write that focusing on that side of the stick brings me more of that. And here my *warning bells* ring, because for me that looks like focusing on that to get more of that. To get "women". To get "money". Like, focusing on that to fix something. Like, I could focus on positive situations with women instead of the fear in the appointments with women I have. So, the difference, the looking at the having end of the stick with better feelings means: Doing the work to feel better. Focusing on the having end of the stick with not feeling better means: wanting to fix the situations. BUT, how can someone, who read anothers work know if the poster didn't felt better (NO criticism)? The last paragraph, where you put words in my mouth is so interesting and I think extremly helpful when get it, so I will read that again, until I get it.

    TBH I was totally overwhelmed by the fact to focus AWAY from a topic to another (and I can totally see how that will WORK and help me feel much better, because just reading that example and KNOWING I can do that was exciting for me). Because when I think about how hard some emotions are I feel and I get that soo often, to focus away from that topic and not work on that thoughts directly is like bury my "hope" to someday breath clearly, experience a date or something without feeling a third world war with nuclear weapons in my head. Like having huge thougths of regret and then just to change the topic altogether, because even now a situation from last week I am still feeling the negative emotion on it TODAY, without even similar situations but only because the thoughts are so omnipresent.

    For example: The last week until today was sooo much contrast, like <neg. details>. Things I never thought would happen happened. Like, totally powerlessness. I could now focus on the things on those topics THAT work, that are good/better, and I will find them, I know it. And when I feel RELIEF, it's doing the work it is meant to be (and I loved that part you wrote that work will never ends and that this means relief relief relief...) and when not, it's wanting to fix the situation/changing conditions. Because when I focus on the good/better parts of the situations with the knowing that the LoA will bring me more of that, than I know that it will bring me more things I want and that is so conditional, not? Like, I DON'T want to have those unbelievable negative thoughts and emotions with me, because that would make me crazy.

    EDIT: What I thought about when reading your last post, is: When I have this strong neg. emotions about what people might think about me, and I find, and I can do that, situations/people from the past where people thought positive or neutral or whatever about me, then I always wonder where the Emotional Journey is. Because that is one stick, and to hooop from the one end to the other end is not how the LoA opperates. Sure, I have those thoughts from the past, but right now my PoA is more towards the one end, and not the other one. How is this possible. Like playing the piano. I played some pieces in the past, and then I interrupt my play for some years. Then I had the possibility to play the piano again and I had to practise those pieces again. Not everything from the begining of course, but I had to first get to that level again, and that took some time.

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