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Thread: The work, make progress in my emotions using Emotional Guidance System - step by step

  1. #221
    Klassik's Avatar
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    Ok let's do some soothing.

    "From one day to another I have to pay thousands of € in 3 days, but I can't even buy food. I am totally desperate."
    1. Maybe I can ask them to start paying in rates from January, so I don't have the pressure to come up with that money in that short time.
    2. I know they won't take stuff away from immediately, like they wrote in the letter, so I have some reminder by them first before that will happen.
    3. Maybe I can cancel my "build loan contract" so I would have the money.
    4. I don't know how to proceed, but it can't get more worse.
    5. At least I have paid the rent for this month.
    6. I know I will get paid the rent next month. Not sure how to pay other things, but the rent will be paid at least.
    7. Maybe I can sell some stuff so I have some money for electricity.
    8. I avoided it to apply for the jobs the job department forced-offered me, bit maybe I can try to apply there so I have some money think properly. I don't have to work there forever.
    9. I heard someone was in a similar situation and she is still living in her apartment, with the same demanding job dep. for the money backpayment. Maybe it is only so strong for me, because I never experienced that before.
    10. Maybe this isn't the end of all time for me like it felt in the first minutes, maybe this is just a huge opportunity to learn how to relax even under those circumstances. (More general)
    11. My will to life in a save place is hopefully stronger than living in the streets, so that I will apply for some of the job applying offers.
    12. I mean people were forced to work in forced slavery starved to dead only 70 years ago in my country so my position is quite human compared to it.
    13. With some days distance, maybe so will see it all more calm.

    Edit:

    To focus more on the having end of the stick: "I have no money right now. That is evidence. But this side job at the theatre, I got a call from days ago where I was announced that I will earn so much money next month, that I have money. That money, helps me that I can sleep more better (it's like 5:20 AM right now.) I will have this money, because I earned it already in October. And in December I will even earn more. So I have definitely ways money comes in. I am so grateful for THAT money. So this money outlet, where I earned 1/3 of last year, will now pay my rent. Wonderful. This will get me going, this will allow me to pay for my rent for the first time, only by money I EARNED, with "work" I LOVE. I mean, I get paid that money to act, to get a costume AND to have FUN! How cool is that? It's like doing a hobby I love, but I get money for it.

    And I heard the head of that department in the theatre, that she is looking from January for a new men for the service. And, I don't even have to apply for it, she already is considering me for that position. Even more money from that environment, hurray!"
    Last edited by Klassik; 5 Days Ago at 12:31 AM.

  2. #222
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    Let's do some more soothing.
    "For the first time in life from one day to another (and I know that those things happen overnight out of nowhere) I feel anxiety for my existence. I feel shame, not even have enough money for basic... That does not feel good to go there, I feel the negativity coming up, so let's go more general. I really was taking care of my financials, even collected every receipt. I men, who does that? I was really responsible for my money. I can't understand how that could happened. I don't have to know how that did happen, I don't need to go 'down' the rabbit hole, because with it I would focus more on what I don't want.

    I am so lucky that I could improve my income this year at the theatre steadily, that I will right when I need it with the beginning of next month can pay my rent for the month. I relied on others money, but now I can do it on my own, right, when I need it. So, there is some light on the end of the tunnel. That gives me airtime to think more clearly, to make better decisions. And with the job offers I have to apply for from the job department, maybe one will hire me, so that I have a more improved situation very soon. Sure, that is not my dream job, but it is nice to get money from streams where I am responsible for 100 % and can finally even start building up some assets. So in all the negativity I can feel a sense of hope (maybe not the hope Abraham is talking about). So I can feel how my emotions are improving, while I typing these words. And in the end, I will learn so much from this situation and will be more able to find relief, whenever I want to, because that is what I want."

  3. #223
    Klassik's Avatar
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    AH! Wait, is this "trying to fix sth." because I focus(ed) in my work towards what I don't want? Like talking in my work about what-is to "wrench" the what-i-don't-want-what-is to the ground? I am currently re-re-re-reading what you wrote in your last post. If that is the case, than I would have made an improvement here towards doing the work. You are free to answer here.

  4. #224
    Klassik's Avatar
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    And more:

    Start: "I feel so shit/desperate/regret when I see this young women who are more determined and work towards their goal (and attractive). I even asked her out after weeks of wobbling and fearing. So she unites everything I want (women/going after desires) and that just feels incredibly terrible. I hate that there are guys who can go to her even without knowing her and get her like nothing."

    What I want: feeling of doing something with my life, feeling of being independent of women

    "She IS talking to me. She IS flirting with me. I am talking to her. I asked her out for watching a piece together, she said yes. Sure, the first thoughts about that I was shitting my pants and avoided asking her. But I did it. So, maybe that factor of being not doing much isn't a factor in this dating thing. I heard Abraham say that it's about alignment. I met a solo female singer in the audience when I watched an opera and we could easily talk with each other. She is really ambitious and she is working a lot for her art. So, I AM talking to those people. I am talking with people, who are ambitious. Those people talk with me. So, I can see how I am doing better as I thought. I asked her out once for some "harmless" thing (not the singer), maybe I can ask women out for some more private things. Because, lately, I began thinking about those things, even imagined how that could be possible like never before. So, I started painting this picture in my mind automatically and that means, I can see that this is a possible thing for me. So I am actually doing much better than I thought. I talked to the attractive xyz at the rehearsal yesterday, and that felt very good. When I think about it I most often talk more to women than to anyone else. So I CAN do this."

    Feels at least better than the things before.

    I will get this "focusing on the feeling better". I will eventually get this and mine that relief that is in store for me.

  5. #225
    Klassik's Avatar
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    I am so vagarious in my "goals"..
    ...I just don't know exactly what I want and that scares me, that I don't know how I can ever achieve what I want (money, relationships, deep knowledge in topics I like, etc) through this attitude.


    But, is that true? Is that really really true, that I don't even have a small clue of what I want? I heard Abraham say, that, when I don't know what I want I know even better what I want. I see often what I don't want, so the answer is somewhere in my vortex already. My IB knows what I want. And, on top of that, I know already generally what I want. I know the broader area where, what I like to do is based. That is nice. When I know think about it, I even got "applauded" by an actor that I re-changed my direction that early in life, a thing, what other people never are able to do in their whole lifes. And I had the strengh, the courage to do that. That feels awesome. I never felt about this before in this way, because I never seen this from this angle. I like that realization.

    I now feel much better about the fact, that I am at the theatre for that long as an "background artist" (not sure if that is the correct translation). I had somethings todo the last years, so I couldn't do anything else. So now I have a much better feeling in doing that. I know that someone laughed at me that I am "still" there, but now that doesn't bother me that much anymore. Hurray! Awesome.


    Last edited by Klassik; 4 Days Ago at 02:45 PM. Reason: formatting

  6. #226
    Super Moderator WellBeing's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    I am currently re-re-re-reading what you wrote in your last post. If that is the case, than I would have made an improvement here towards doing the work. You are free to answer here.

    I'm reluctant to reply here because I've been noticing that each time I do reply you leave your thread for longer and longer absences. It seems to me that my replies are having the effect of calling you away from your “work” here when my intention is to encourage your “work.” So, I'm going to try to keep my reply here "brief."

    Quote Originally Posted by Klassik View Post
    AH! Wait, is this "trying to fix sth." because I focus(ed) in my work towards what I don't want? Like talking in my work about what-is to "wrench" the what-i-don't-want-what-is to the ground?

    When you think about it, what you're really asking us here is “Am I doing this 'right’?” That's a fair question. Any answer to your fair question hinges on how we define “right.”

    Now, you've heard our very simple and accurate answer to your fair question: “You can easily tell. (You don't need us.) You feel better than you had been feeling before. You feel relief.” As long as your definition of “right” is “Do I feel better for having done my 'work’ (or having meditated or having taken my nap, etc.)?” then it really is that simple.

    When you're asking “Where's my stuff?” or when you're not willing to shift your focus away from your issue or when you rule out an approach because you can't see how it will bring you the stuff you so clearly want or when you're doing your “work" to prevent this awful thing from happening to you again or when you do your “work” and the relief that you feel is because you're observing your “work” and thinking “I can see that I'm doing my 'work,’ that I'm a 'good Aber,’ and that means I'm getting my stuff” (I'm NOT criticizing; just listing some of “the things that you have been doing” that we've discussed in your thread here) then you can ask yourself if you've shifted your definition of “right” to mean “Will this get me my stuff?” And if you're still not certain (after all, you might have to practice yourself into your awareness and your self-honesty) you can look around you to see what you're manifesting.

    ------------------
    A brief comment about what you've been sharing with us: You seem to have created a fast-moving stream, with a bit of momentum. That's all right. So, I want to share some tips to help you with your ride on this particular of the stream.

    First off, contrary to what we usually recommend here on the Forum, in this moment, take your action journeys (on the job, money, housing fronts). Make the wisest action decisions you can make for yourself at this time and regain your stability. It's hard to do this vibrational “work” if you're not eating or if you're out on the street. Abraham would certainly recommend to you that you arrange things so that your existence is no longer threatened. Make your action journeys your priorities at this time. They will be your paths of least resistance (because you Believe--almost all humans do--in the effect of action).

    One practical tip I use: There are times when we create momentum so that it seems that life just comes at us and we have to deal with it. At this times, especially when we're mired in the action journey (as I've just recommended), it can be hard to balance our vibrational “work” with our “taking care of business.” What I like to do during those times is schedule my time: a chunk of the day for action and a chunk for vibrational “work.” Make each chunk as big as your practical common sense tells you. For example, if your practical common sense tells you that it's wise, prudent and necessary to spend 4 hours of your day at rehearsal and 10 hours finding or working your other job and 3 hours doing normal life stuff, leaving 1 hour for your vibrational “work,” arrange your schedule according to your practical common sense. Set these up as appointments or commitments, even with yourself. This is a variation on Abe's Segment Intending Process from AAIIG.

    That way, when you start to worry or panic about some action thing during your vibrational “work” appointment, you can honestly put those thoughts aside, knowing that you’ve scheduled ample time for your action. You can soothe your thoughts with honest statements like “I don’t have to think about that now” or "I'm taking care of business" so that you can refocus on your vibrational “work.”

    Once you’ve gotten yourself out of crisis mode, you can then re-jigger your schedule so that you can (if you want) devote more time to your alingment, where your leverage is.

    Prioritize your “work.” Make getting yourself safe, sheltered, fed and stable (and your vibrations surrounding all that) your priority. That also means temporarily putting your women issues and your peer issues on a back burner.

    Adopt some new strategies. During times of intense momentum, more often than not, the best we can do is to manage the momentum. Managing our momentum AND our vibration at the same time is Olympic-worthy performance.

    When we're in the midst of powerful unwanted momentum, our primary goal is to allow the momentum to subside. We don't “make” the momentum subside. That's not our “job.” The momentum will subside on it's own as long as we don't add to the momentum. In practical terms, that means using Abraham's list of “what to do when you're falling out of the airplane without a parachute” (re-ordered by me, in light of the most recent Workshops):

    1. Meditate.
    2. Take a nap.
    3. Distract yourself.
    4. (If you're unable to do any of the above) Go general.


    Almost anything else will add momentum. You can feel it when you do. It's at times like these that the true meaning of the word, soothing, comes in handy. What would you tell a dear friend who came to you reporting what you are now living to help your dear friend feel better? Tell that to yourself. Do this as much as possible.

    If you haven't yet started a daily meditation practice, I would highly recommend you do so, first thing in the morning. 15 minutes a day is all that's necessary. You can repeat later in the day, if you'd like.

    Lastly, be easy on yourself. Keep in mind that the Stream of Well-Being is dominant, even dominant over the momentum that appears in your life at this moment. Everything that you want is Downstream.
    Last edited by WellBeing; 4 Days Ago at 11:02 PM. Reason: Formatting

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