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Thread: The work, make progress in my emotions using Emotional Guidance System - step by step

  1. #291
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    Lets try something more difficult.

    XYZ. is such a hot girl and I see, that she isn't uninterested, but when she is standing right in front of me I am so nervous and do nothing.

    Such a hot women is interested in me, HURRAY! But what is that worth, besides the realization that I can't talk and behave normally next to her? I understand that one feel some tension, but that here is nearly torture. Hm. That makes me feel angry, that I can't do anything. It anoyes me, that I can't, although I have this Teachings (and the things before) that I haven't found a way to get over those nervous feeling. But it's not about making something happen with these Teachings anyway. It's about feeling better, and I should more blame myself than the Teachings because I haven't properly applied them yet, because I see that other feel relief.

    I can't think straight and I could purk when I think about how many opportunites are glided through my hand in all those years. Urgs.
    That makes me REALLY feel angry, because that doesn't only happen with her, but with like aaaaaall women. And that makes me question if I will ever get this done, if I will ever be able to do that (discouragement). At least I can feel some relief here.

    I have no idea, how to behave, how to keep the interaction going and how make a date happen, because I don't have really date experience and I think that women like her have so many guys hanging on their "ass" that I don't even have a chance to this competition because they are nearly always more social than I am.
    That is true, that my dating experience isn't zero, but it's near zero. And I "pretend" to be someone who does maybe have dates, so standing in front of women and "admitting" to have not so much experience as (society?) wants me to have at my age and what this women expect me to have makes me feel really ashamed. Because I learned years ago "fake it" and to some degree I still do that. Yes, I really feel ashamed by that, and I often "try" to make naughty jokes or "try" to be someone I am not just so that people think I have a lot of experience and that I can handle women, and because I have the imagine that with my "hobby" that should be normal to be good with women. That feels better to admit that to myself, that I think that. It doesn't serve me to try so hard, I shouldn't force myself to do things I can't, or to pretend things I can't do.

    So I don't know how to ever solve this right now, but that isn't my job anyway, my only option anyay is to feel better. It's not so easy to do that but with some time and focus I can definetely do that. And I am doing it right now.

    And the thoughts, that she or any other women are flooded with men: I really don't know that. I guess that, but I don't know. And it shouldn't bother me (but it does), because life is about vibration and not about how many people are after her. So I shouldn't think about that I never ever will have a chance or will get better at that, because there really is no competition on vibration and there is enough for everyone. I read that, but I don't buy that yet 100 % (I mean, I don't feel it, don't Believe it).

    Because, actually, with my life how it is right now, I HAD "dates", I met women. It wasn't super smooth like I imagined it would be like, but I had those dates with women with my life how it is and those women were pretty attractive. So, there is the evidence that it IS about vibration and not about other action things. That actually feels like relief here. And I didn't had problems make those dates happen, because, yeah, I often wasn't even the active part there. Sure, I would like it to be other around, that I have the active part, but that is not the thing here right now. It worked, and that counts.

    -
    So, a pause, because that takes really some time to get those thoughts (that was probably nearly an hour, not straight focused but here and there). (But I could work on and on, my notice booklet is full of thoughts to shift).

  2. #292
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    For the first time I earned so much through theatre, that I can pay everything that comes in a month. Everything. Rent, electricity, food, this, that. Everything. For the FIRST time in 7 years! But that is not always the case, because I can't see how that would be possible the next months, and I worry how get regulary this amount of money through this desirable thing.

    Worry is on the Scale, so, what is above the scale? Doubt. So, I can find thoughts of Doubt and that must feel better, because Doubt is more in Alignment than Worry. So, I really can not believe that I will get always enough money out of this source, I just can't believe that, that would be a wonder. Sure, it increased and increased and I could see some ways that it is possible, but right now I can't Believe that. And I am not sure how to react now. What should I do? That is not the question, "What to do" is never the question. I should acknowledge, that I manifested this money by myself with my vibration. Last year I DIDN'T do that, so I have made progress here!

    I made it happen to go from some hundred s a month, if even, to nearly 1k OUT OF THIS ALONE. Without having learned that stuff. I know that some professional, PROFESSIONAL singer here don't earn that much in a month - that means, I EARNED that month MORE than a professional singer with a AT LEAST 4 year long study session at music university, and I just "manifested" it without anything of that!

    So, I REALLY must have shift my vibration here. That is awesome. I like that.

    And it is frustrating to think about how I can't see that this will repeat the next months. Hm, that would be nice if that is, but it isn't. And... I am not doing this here to "make this happen" through magical thinking, but to find some relief from my starting thought. That worked partially.

    And, this month I know that I will "manifest" the double sum by another source. That is surely not will social payments the Job Departements wants me to earn money, but it's 2k , and I already "worked" for it, so it IS ON ITS way! And the things I had to do were sooo easy, and I have done it, and they will send it next week. Nice.

    -
    TBH, that is some relief, but I lend to much out of "outer" things, not created from the original thought, and that is what I want, because I don't have always these additional information I can sooth things with like those extra money that is comming in.

  3. #293
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    I definetely feel something (better) here. But I still don't have a "rule of thumb" to do that work, I just try and try and try with the risk, that the thought is even upstream, because they are so alike. And I have to say, there IS something, there IS relief, and that is I really haven't felt so often last year (on those storys of mine), so there is progress and that is SUPER and that gives hope (and I don't wrote Hope because that is probably not right).

    This guy even keeps me up at night.. I am so jealous about him and that he can do the role without problems and that he is playing the role nearly 20 times in a row and I was told I will play that part, too, sometimes, but he doesn't even consider to thing about letting me play that part even once.

    I don't want to think about that, but this guy, actually a good friend now, making me thinking thoughts that makes me feel angry. I mean, how would he feel if I would take a piece HE want's to play? That wouldn't feel good for him, but that is what he is doing with me. Actually, he isn't doing it, with all that I am understanding I attracted this situation, so the only one I can "blame" is myself, he is only my manifestation of my vibration. But it feels better to blame him for now. I mean, he is so nice, why is he such a jerk here? Why he even don't consider taking some performances off and take the stage to me? He could do that, we have so many performances that one or two wouldn't be a huge notch for him. If I ever will play that piece? Hm.

    And he doesn't have any problems going on stage where I shit into my pants only by the thought of it, although I would love to do it on the same time.

    When I think about staying in front of those people, with little to no practise... I think that wouldn't be the problem, but it's my thoughts of my worth and that I could blame myselfd so heavily in front of those people that makes me fearful. I mean, I played in front of soooo many people, mostly people I have never seen before, so why is that such a big deal for me? I mean, no one is going to kill me here... And when they would laugh, they would, but how likely is that? They would see my insecurity.. maybe they would even "pay" me respect for playing in front of soo many people... argh, but I don't buy that thought.

    There are even some people ON stage, some professional actors, who do that for a living and they talk good to me and have a good meaning about me.. so, some even would be very kind after the performance, and that are PROS! So there are people I KNOW personally who have a good meaning about me.. and then it's likely that in the audience, there are more people like that, I mean, with like 800 people per performance, there are enough who will have good thoughts about what I did or don't really care... what is still better than destroying me.

  4. #294
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    The last evening was really heavy for me. And although 95 % of the time were horrible, at the END it was for a short time UNBELIEVABLE AWESOME. I have made sooooo many notes because I had soooooo many thoughts and I will work them "up" this day. So, that is "Part 1 of .."

    The "work" I did below is interesting, because that is really "negative" still, but that didn't felt like WORK, it gave me some relief, although it's still pretty dark and it was kind of EASY to do that. I have the work-example by WB open for inspiration. The cursive BTW is the original story.

    I first had a positive attitude about this evening, because it would be just going around and getting money for it. But it already started when I saw myself in the mirrow of the "make-up" room, where we got ready. Then I know, that wouldn't be a fun evening. I looked so unhappy, and I thought about all the nice looking and self-confident people this evening I would see.
    I want feel better on that - I don't know if that is going to happen in the future after the work, and I can't rewind the last evening and have a better experience there, it's over, but I can feel better right now and that has worth.

    When I have seen myself in the mirror and looked into the sad face, then of course that couldn't feel very good. And to think about all the neg. things that would happen, or lets be precisely here, all the negative thoughts I would have this evening, of course that wouldn't feel very good and that experience wouldn't be very fun. I can really rely on the LoA and it gave me exactly how I felt, just like Abraham is saying, so that is a good thing. The LoA works and I got evidence, again.

    And then the negative train rolling, and I couldn't really stop it, because thought after thought it got more negative, and that is the momentum they talk here about on the forum. Again, something that is in the Teaching!

    I know, that there have been times, when I wasn't looking like a sad person, who didn't wanted to put his head into the ground. So that is really a thought thing.
    And all the mirrors there, argh, I really would have loved if someone had destroyed them!

    And it was like this. My female partner on my side had the most attention, and I was treated like "oh, you are also there... hi." I couldn't be angry to them, because I didn't liked myself then either.
    I mean, what are those people there? They weren't even so polite to help me by telling a joke, I mean, they must have seen that my face wasn't funny and wasn't "appropiate" for that classy evening event. They didn't even asked, if something is wrong. Urgs.

    And I shouldn't beat myself up that I couldn't starte the interactions, because I felt just terrible and then it would be nearly impossible for that at the moment, like running a marathon when you are chained on a chair, you can't run.

    And when we made the obligated pictures for the organizer, I really felt so down for looking so laughable in that images. Urgs.

    Yeah, what the, "hm, there is one of the big group who looks so unhappy, let's make them feel comfortable so the picture will be more brighter. We will publish the image even on our FB pages where thousand people can see that, so let's cheer him up." but nothing. They can't even do this small little thing.

    Even when there were people I knew I was ashamed of myself and felt negative emotion and just wanted to not go to them, but my partner there wanted to say hi, ugh.

    I felt not only terrible because my mood was in Antarctic, but they were all so dressed up so nicely and I didn't wanted just "stand" there like a small kid with his parents. I hate this so much. My partner that evening there didn't thought that far and headed there. Urgs. OK, I would have gone there if that were persons I would like and could talk to easily, but not like this.

    And through my mind I had the thoughts: "I am here at this theatre fine event and I don't want to get asked what I am doing for a living." because I knew those people for years and they all studied and progressed and I did like nothing and I payed my last rent by being a background artist - like being STILL a background artist for all those years, a thing that people normally do as a hobby and I know NO one who does this to pay the rent (because that is very unlikely, too) and how immature this approach to life is. (that is worth considering an extra work session)

  5. #295
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    After re-reading that I think I am still sometimes too nice in my new (to be feeling) words.

    At the avenue that evening I met the mother of someone I knew and she asked us to bring them something because she wasn't allowed backstage. And, she then asked about my "secret" business (because I told months ago her that I have something in the making but I wanted it to keep secret, because that felt better back then just to say "I am doing nothing" but doing something "secret" was true, because I had then just created my business). And I didn't knew what to answer. Didn't felt good to be remembered, to haven't earned a with that business yet. So the topic changed and she then offered me her help in TAXing, because she back then told me that she is expert in this. So SHE gave me her card.

    That was somehow unexpected, because I was soooo out of alignment when we met at the evening but he offered me her help in that without anything from my part doing.
    Oh, why does she remember me about my not succeeded business? That felt veeeery off. It remembered me about all the details and the not success about it. Why did she do that to me? She could have been more softer in the conversation, to not push me into the corner here. Ergs. Sure, she reminded me that I have this business thing still in my vibration, and that is a good thing, because I now can clean it up a bit. So, what's the deal that I haven't succeeded yet? I am not going to die. Nobody is expecting me to succeed in that, that is totally my "business". And, I have money for now, so I don't need it anyway right now in this second to survice. But it's surely worth thinking about the business, because I wanted to do something there for a long time.

    Right now, I can only win and potential customer can only win, because there NOTHING to fail, because the ground is still clean! That is nice. No pressure here. And my business is so small, that the TAXes and the german IRS is good to work with, if that should be come to me.

    Hm.

    • And she REMEMBERED that conversation from months ago! So, I have made an impression on her! Isn't that nice?!
    • I like, that she offered me her help.
    • I like, that the LoA organized circumstances to bring me an expert with TAXing.
    • I like, how that is an improvement for my "business", in some way.

  6. #296
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    I am too tired now for more work after that, although I have plenty on my notes from yesterday, still. This is from today.

    When I went to the GYM today, I was at my stations. Then, there was a pretty attractive women (yeah) and I got instant negative emotion. That is really unfortunate to get reminded of my low vibe all the time. I couldn't even look into her direction when she looked into mine.

    Oh how I HATE those "BAM" emotions! It's like someone is pushing you out of the airplane with a parachute without giving a countdown (wait, where did I heard that before..). I see that those instant emotions suck (when they are negative) but they are really worthy guidance, that, what Abraham is talking about. So, I can find thoughts with a bit distance and SHIFT those thoughts and therefore the feelings! So I CAN feel better. It won't change that I can go to her or whatever but I will feel better and that is really worthy for me. And it's about NOW, not for the future or to unmake that event, but to feel better NOW when I think about that stuff NOW. So it's a good thing to get reminded about that so often so I will not forget to work on that and feel better and get into alignment more of the time and eventually will have a better experience in the future. Who knows. (That really feels better, wow).

    And what is the thing with looking into her direction, ok, looking at HER? Is that here GYM? No! Does she have to wear so sexy? Does she have to be here? If she complaints, what the f**k would be her arguments of me NOT looking at her? She could wear a potato back. And I won't suppress my natural "instinct" of sexuality by not looking at her, I won't do her that favor, because that would feel even worse (wait, that is action journey).

    That is my life and I write my OWN rules and she is my manifestation, she is my vibrational indicator.

    Do I will ever have a women like her? Do I want to be with a women like her, like other people want to have big amounts of money? I am really not sure at this moment, if that will ever be happening, but that is not the question here. I should remind myself, that I TALKED to those attractive women in the past, heck, I even talked to a women kinda like that some days ago. So, maybe that will be possible someday.

    And it makes my training (or whatever it is I am doing in my day) unconcentrated and it isn't really "fun" (not fun but someting better than the negative stuff) anymore. I mean, I like attractive women, but at the same time my thoughts about them causes strong neg. emotions.

    Like, will I ever be able to go to them and talk to them naturally? Will I ever see be Hopefully enough to think that I will have them eventually in my life? Hm.

    Oh jesus, I don't have to FIGURE THAT OUT YET. I know this guy from the orch., who had his first wife with end 30. So I have still TIME WITHOUT END. So, chances are, that this might work out someday. That I have feelings that are nicer than now, not only NOW and HERE, but in front of a women.

    And I hate it that they sometimes train so close to me that I HAVE to look (to who I am talking I recognize them even when they are at the other end of the room in milliseconds), but then I feel like a pervert/needy guy, who shouldn't do that, because I don't won't to be looked at one and want to feel appreciation for the women instead (yes, that is not near where I am).

    OK, that isn't finished yet, but that is too much now to find more BFTs on that.

  7. #297
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    So I am not yet finished with my notes from that evening on saturday, but I had a thought meanwhile I wanted to work on, because I really won't to get into the habbit of feeling better all the time. Not as some pressure, but to make it a habbit like going to the toilet (eh).

    When I thought about it - it just came random into my mind while preparing some food - I thought about the evening at the venue on saturday. Like, the 5 % of the time where I was in alignment and how "random" it was how I get into that not by actually soothing but by some action (I did not have so much control over, just "happened", and I don't mean "inspired") and if I will ever be able to get over this and to get into alignment in those situations like it's my second nature, like enjoying those situations like most of the people did there without any effort...

    1. Sometimes I really wonder if I ever will get better at this, because that evening felt really off (most of the time). And I mean REALLY off. like depression/despair mixed with some worthlessness. Maybe I can get some relief by seeing that I was for a short period of time in alignment and that it had nothing really to do with changing the conditions. That I was then more calm was a result of my more-in-alignment and not because I then (as a RESULT, not the cause) could more easily talk to strangers and participate in those fun social things.
    2. So, I've done this, somehow, and could see that I was sooo much closer to all the things I desire, and that happened so fast. It was not alignment, but I felt really better.
    3. So I CAN get into alignment there.
    4. I know (hm, do I Know it?), I see, that I want this alignment. But isn't that this "yearning" because of lack? Because that feeling that evening for that short time was awesome and really far from what I am used to feel in those situations.
    5. Maybe I can sooth that with the thought, that I don't have to figure this out now, and that I have still sooo much time to figure this out and then enjoying the fruits for a very long time. Sure, I don't buy this "after death things" by Abraham yet (and haven't really tried to understand that yet), so I am refering to my "in this body" time on earth.
    6. Because, some of the people there, I mean, nearly most of them, were older than me (sure not all but many). And they even had some resistance in their thinking because of what they talk sometimes (so obvious for ME), so I have so much fun ahead of me, because I learn to shift my resistance and when I am like, 5 years older, I will have sooo much joy in my life BECAUSE I KNOW then how to do it with EASE. And I have seen that I don't have to get better at being social and this, because that came out AUTOMATICALLY by just feeling better there.
    7. And with THIS work here I am doing so much more - I am listening much more on those "small" thoughts between tasks and DO something about it, that I haven't done earlier. Of course my work is not of the quality of the work of some of those "experts" on the forum, but it's like learning to walk, and to do a marathon, like WB says often.
    8. Sure, I am mainly doing still nothing productive all day in terms of action - urgs, that feels off - but that is another topic.

  8. #298
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    Outer Statement: I feel totally s**t being still "under" the hands of the Job Dep.

    1. They are helping me with getting my life together by supporting me with money.
    2. That is a part I really appreciate about them.
    3. I can be thankful that we have something like this in this country.
    4. Everytime they "invite" me I always have thoughts to work on - and that means, feeling better about important parts of my life. Thoughts, I wouldn't touch or found without their help.
    5. They really want to help me, otherwise they wouldn't hand-pick so many jobs where I can apply.
    6. They are really patient with me.
    7. They seem to "believe" in me, otherwise they wouldn't give me job to apply to with my resume.
    8. It's good so the that I have worth for them.
    9. I like to be of worth for the economy.
    10. I like that they support me.
    11. I like that I seem to feel better about them and to have another point of view than most of society about them now (a more positive one) and that I did that on purpose.
    12. I am kind of more OK with going to my next appointment there.

    Inner Statement: I feel OK with being under JD.

    EDIT: second FW; I found this post by WB (and I didn't searched for that, I was searching FW by a different user): http://www.abeforum.com/showthread.p...l=1#post853292
    Outer Statement: I want more money.

    1. In the last two months, I allowed enough money to pay my bills and all what is needs to be paid easily. I allowed that money through different sources.
    2. I like that those sources were nice and fitted me and that I didn't had to do a thing, that those opportunities were aligned for me comfortably.
    3. I like how that really often in the past time more opportunities popping up to earn money.
    4. I like that I were in alignment then, because it always felt kind of good.
    5. I really like being in alignment on this very important topic of probably everybodys life.
    6. I really like that I am having an easy time finding those statements and that they give me a sense of relief here.
    7. I love seeing that my financial feeling is raised without changing anything.
    8. I love how I can get into the feeling of this so easily. I love how that is working so fine right now.
    9. I love being financially secure and sheltered, because that frees up the mind to focus on things that are fun.
    10. I love how that last statement really felt awesome and how the past statements came to my mind so fast and easily and how that is the LoA in action (momentum).
    11. I love, how not only do I feel better, but how that means LoA is aligning more opportunities how this feeling can be enhanced furthermore!
    12. I love this feeling of well being here.
    13. I don'T know how that is playing out in "Real Life", but that is not my job and not my intention here anyway. My intention is to feel better and to intensify that feeling I am headed to. (I added this statement because I still had this thought in my head: "you feel better now, but that doesn't mean that money will rain down, you will still have to do sth..")

    Inner Statement: I love feeling financially secure and sheltered.
    Last edited by Klassik; 1 Week Ago at 11:02 AM. Reason: added another FW

  9. #299
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    I feel so lost in my self-employment (business), I don't have a clue, how to ever be able to earn money and to earn enough money by it.
    That reeeally sucks, that I don't get ahead here. When people ask me, I feel like a looser, because I have nothing after 12 months. I soooo was fire to make this happen, and that it would be happening fast, but nothing happened.

    It isn't, that I am questioning the LoA. But obviously I have some thought pattern that are hindering me on make this happen, because otherwise it would be happening, because I asked, and it is given. OK, do I believe in that? Hm.

    I surely understand that the finished business won't drop out of the sky, and I don't want that anyway. I want to the way to there, I want the step-by-step success, to get used to business and to have fun along the way! I see, that it IS possible, and that other people made it already happen and proven me, that it works.

    I really "burn" to do something there, step by step getting closer there, but I know so less. I kind-of know what I would offer, but what about people BUYING it, what about IS-IT-ENOUGH, what about if that even brings me not once cent? I don't know.
    I feel fear, fear with the thought, that I would waste my time, if I would just "make" something without something tangible success at the end (like someone buys it). Hm.. maybe that has something positive, because Abraham says, that in everything there is unwanted and wanted. I would learn my craft more. But on the same side, Abraham says that talent and work isn't that important, it's alignment that is important.

    Moooah, why isn't that better explained at the forum? so many success there, but nothing real explained. Sure, that my price for ALL I "want" is feeling better and getting into alignment. And I really like to pay this price, because I LIKE this. But sometimes it feels so hard to achieve that, and sometimes it feels like one step forward, two steps backwards.

    -

    Were mere work but too much to translate.

  10. #300
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    The prices of the sauce in the super market are like 2 1/2 I will buy. I don't feel comfortable with choosing the cheaper one. I don't want to think about the money when I go shopping, grml. And I HAVE the money, but I don't feel comfortable paying that price yet.

    1. I allowed money to buy the more expensive sauce, so if I wanted to, I could buy that sauce.
    2. But I am not yet comfortable with that, because I don't know if I will need that money otherwise and and and..
    3. Oh man I don't want always choose the cheaper stuff, that is not nice.
    4. Hm, if I ever will be able to buy that more exquisite stuff?
    5. Right now, I am just not sure about that. I heard Abraham saying that I have those stuff put into my vortex, but I don't feel that yet.
    6. But in the light of my general improved money situation, I maybe will even improve my vibe here, too, and then feel better about it RIGHT NOW and later enjoy the fruits of the more finer sauce.
    7. Wouldn't it be nice, if I didn't had to think about money ever again?
    8. Wouldn't t be nice, if I could enjoy shopping more?
    9. Wouldn't it be nice, if I could enjoy shopping more, because I just like to feel better EVERYWHERE?
    10. It sounds nice to put money out of the equation.
    11. I like, that I allowed more money lately with much ease.
    12. I like how that works.
    13. I like how I feel better now.
    14. I like, that by focusing on that, I will attract more money, too!
    15. I like, how I get it more and more!

    Whoho!

    I think about starting a new thread, solely focusing on money and business and those kind of thoughts, because that would be more focused and readers are more comfortable reading it. I don't think all are good with reading my women stuff here (although that is their vibration and their thoughts about it, so it's actually not my business, but I'd like to be nice here).

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