OK I feel insecure and if only I can get a bunch of money and success then people will respect me and I will respect me and not feel insecure.

I feel ashamed, insecure, fear, guilt because I have my mother's voice playing on autoloop over and over and over in my head, telling me that I should be doing something with my life, even though I dont have a recollection of her saying anything like that.

I dont give a shit about what she thinks I should be doing because she clearly has no idea what shes talking about. If she did maybe I wouldnt turn out the way I did. Maybe I should remind her of that.I think this feeling has more to do with my interpretation of whats going on than whats actually going on. I dont think I would feel this bad if I wouldnt have this debilitating belief. If I could just figure out how to release it...

Obviously I didnt make it up, I had to have heard it when I was younger and now Im replaying it in my head. I dont think it was personal. People are always trying to help and give advice even if it may not be the best advice for someone else. Even if it was a critique, I dont think it was personal. People only lash out when their out of alignment themselves. It wouldnt have happened if both of us didnt attract the unpleasant exchange in the first place.

Nothing really is wrong here. I knew when I came forth into this reality that I would be a bumping into others and expanding from these experiences. I can catch it when I feel the negative emotion and release it, one instance at a time. I feeling better already. I can do this. I'm glad I felt the negative emotion. I if I didnt, it would just keep going on and on but I felt it and stopped it. This is it, this is the path!