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Thread: The next step

  1. #41

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Abraham used to tell the story of Jerry who used to teach others how to create businesses. One of the things he would teach people is to keep their business ideas to themselves -- because when people tell others their ideas when they're not yet in alignment with them, those people usually just introduce resistance into the equation. Often what happens is that people want to tell others in the hope that the others will shore up the way they feel about their ideas, but the others just end up weighing them down. Abraham agreed -- you have to work out the bugs in what you want and really practice the way you feel before you want to share the ideas of what you want so that you're stable and what others say won't affect you.
    Let's break it all down - it's always about the same thing: feel better. Just a little bit better, damn shit. That's enough.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Sure, you have the restlessness of telling yourself that you don't want to do something and overcoming that resistance with telling yourself that you HAVE to do it anyway. You want freedom from that feeling of bondage. The point that Abraham makes is that it's not freedom from the action or job you're reaching for, it's freedom from the resistance. When people tell Abraham that they don't want to go to their job, they point out that there are many things they've asked for in that job, it's just an issue of that they insist that the whole thing is something that they don't want to do. That's really the case here. You can continue to go to work because you HAVE to not because you want to, or you can decide that maybe there's wanted things there, even more than you're used to looking for, and decide you're going to look for them. I know that's asking a lot of you at the moment. That may be something you do later on. Maybe decide you're going to look for things that don't bother you so much when you're there. Really, you're going to find them.
    Oh yes Marc, you are so right in everything. There are a lot of things I don't like about this job, almost everything. It's good that the money arrives on time, overtime is paid, there is a 100% tax-free allowance for Sundays and public holidays and an extra day off. First of all, those are the pleasant things. That's not a lot, is it?

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    You're right. The feeling of obligation and bondage you associate with the hospital and the freedom and empowerment that your apartment represent don't go together. So you're going to have to chip away at soothing that feeling of obligation and bondage so that you start closing that gap.
    The theory when I'm at home thinking about relief for this job is one thing. The practice when I'm there is different. The work doesn't get any easier, it doesn't get less, it doesn't get split between two people. On the contrary, we have to do more and more and at the same time we are given additional tasks.
    The staff complains to each other but no one goes to the right place making clear announcements. Neither do I. A boy from Poland told me that all you have to do is say "yes". All the work is not manageable, so say yes, no stress! Great!!!

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Of course. Anytime you determine that you're powerless -- that you must do something you've decided you don't want to do -- it's going to feel bad. That's you fighting yourself.
    I should stop fighting.
    
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Right, and as long as you try to make this about changing the conditions, you're going to get stuck going in circles. You have the ability to feel better, and if you'll do that you can make progress.
    Always the same Marc, finally feel better!!!! Then things change, yes?!

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Right, when you change subjects you feel better and you're closer to what you want, but then you go back to how you usually focus and you reactivate that resistance. Spend as much time as you can on things that are easier to feel good about and then as you're used to feeling better, you can start massaging the topic of work into a better feeling place.
    Right now there is no area that really feels better. All topics are a bit sluggish.

  2. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Let's break it all down - it's always about the same thing: feel better. Just a little bit better, damn shit. That's enough.
    Exactly. The other piece is that you've got to start paying attention to how things feel and decide whether you want to keep doing them or not.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Oh yes Marc, you are so right in everything. There are a lot of things I don't like about this job, almost everything. It's good that the money arrives on time, overtime is paid, there is a 100% tax-free allowance for Sundays and public holidays and an extra day off. First of all, those are the pleasant things. That's not a lot, is it?
    It doesn't matter whether those are a lot or not. You've identified aspects that do please you. Pay more attention to those. There are more, but at the moment it's not important that you find them. On the flip side, stop telling the story of how there are so many things you don't like and how few things that you do like. That's not the reality you want.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    The theory when I'm at home thinking about relief for this job is one thing. The practice when I'm there is different.
    It's not, actually. You practice at home and as you get better at finding relief, you'll start to see things shift when you get there. It's no different than an actor practicing a part before they get on stage or in front of the camera, or a musician practicing the music before they perform in front of the crowd. They practice and practice until they're comfortable with what they're doing and then when it's time to perform, they're able to let things flow. It's the same here. The issue is that you're practicing the things you don't like when you're home -- look at how much you're insisting that things are terrible and how hard things are. You're literally pre-paving the energy you're going to rendezvous with when you get to work. It's like you're calling in an order to a restaurant and going to pick up the food -- except that you're ordering things you really don't like. The restaurant has the ability to give you food you like, but it's up to you to order something different.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    The work doesn't get any easier, it doesn't get less, it doesn't get split between two people. On the contrary, we have to do more and more and at the same time we are given additional tasks.
    The staff complains to each other but no one goes to the right place making clear announcements. Neither do I. A boy from Poland told me that all you have to do is say "yes". All the work is not manageable, so say yes, no stress! Great!!!
    So here's what I mean when I talk about how you need to start paying attention to how things feel and deciding whether to keep doing them. I know that you're likely being faithful in reporting what you've been observing, but it's not what you want to experience. Do you WANT things to be overwhelming? Or does the idea of getting help appeal to you? Do you WANT things to stay difficult or does the prospect of things getting easier sound good? You're right though, complaining to each other doesn't help, nor does complaining to yourself. The Universe isn't a complaints line where you tell it what you don't like and it fixes things for you. That's the opposite of how things work. If you want things to get easier then you have to stop telling the story about how things don't get easier, at the very least. That's the benefit of practicing at home because there's nothing to contradict you. Another piece of this is that much of the help you're looking for is the help of your Inner Being and the flow of energy. What if rather of going to work and STRUGGLING because you don't want to be there and you feel like it's unjust because of all the things you've decided you don't like, you've started practicing when you're at home that things really can get easier? Instead of feeling drained, you open up to being energized? Instead of resenting that you're there and insisting that it's not what you want, you accept that this is a step along the path to something better? This is really up to you, it's your creation.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    I should stop fighting.
    If you want things to change, yes.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Always the same Marc, finally feel better!!!! Then things change, yes?!
    Yes, you've got to change first. Everything around you is following your lead.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Right now there is no area that really feels better. All topics are a bit sluggish.
    Sure there are, you just need to look for them. Maybe the topic of kittens or puppies or big, fluffy bunnies feels good when you think about them. Maybe nature or art are things you enjoy. Perhaps there are topics that you really don't have any fight with, whether it's something like bubbles or philosophy or astrophysics. There's an entire Universe out there, they're not all a bit sluggish. Not only is there the actual, physical universe, humanity has imagined other universes out there too that you can enjoy. Flowers, sunsets, otters, unicorns. There are abstract things as well: kindness, adventure, curiosity, beauty, wonder. They don't all feel a bit sluggish, you're just being lazy in choosing the things you're used to thinking about instead of choosing things based on how they feel.

  3. #43

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    It doesn't matter whether those are a lot or not. You've identified aspects that do please you. Pay more attention to those. There are more, but at the moment it's not important that you find them. On the flip side, stop telling the story of how there are so many things you don't like and how few things that you do like. That's not the reality you want.
    Yes, I want a different reality and it would be great if I could jump right into the greatest of circumstances. Just because I want to. Just like that, just for fun.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    It's not, actually. You practice at home and as you get better at finding relief, you'll start to see things shift when you get there. It's no different than an actor practicing a part before they get on stage or in front of the camera, or a musician practicing the music before they perform in front of the crowd. They practice and practice until they're comfortable with what they're doing and then when it's time to perform, they're able to let things flow. It's the same here. The issue is that you're practicing the things you don't like when you're home -- look at how much you're insisting that things are terrible and how hard things are. You're literally pre-paving the energy you're going to rendezvous with when you get to work. It's like you're calling in an order to a restaurant and going to pick up the food -- except that you're ordering things you really don't like. The restaurant has the ability to give you food you like, but it's up to you to order something different.
    Today everything was as usual. You mean, if I feel better and better at home, will the circumstances at my workplace change? Oh my god, Marc, what you say is infinitely great. Not that the professor starts cleaning.

    It could be that I get to a better place or that I find a completely different job (I have to write an application for that) or this or that. Oh yes, I like that very much.


    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    So here's what I mean when I talk about how you need to start paying attention to how things feel and deciding whether to keep doing them. I know that you're likely being faithful in reporting what you've been observing, but it's not what you want to experience. Do you WANT things to be overwhelming?
    No, I really don't want that. I've had enough of it.


    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Or does the idea of getting help appeal to you? Do you WANT things to stay difficult or does the prospect of things getting easier sound good?
    Yes, that sounds great. Can I have some more, please! I want help, support. I want to have a little more fun and enjoyment at work. Yes why not?! There is nothing wrong with that. A little more of all the good things every day. I'm here.


    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    If you want things to get easier then you have to stop telling the story about how things don't get easier, at the very least.
    And I'm so good at nagging. Really, I am the queen of whining.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    That's the benefit of practicing at home because there's nothing to contradict you. Another piece of this is that much of the help you're looking for is the help of your Inner Being and the flow of energy. What if rather of going to work and STRUGGLING because you don't want to be there and you feel like it's unjust because of all the things you've decided you don't like, you've started practicing when you're at home that things really can get easier? Instead of feeling drained, you open up to being energized? Instead of resenting that you're there and insisting that it's not what you want, you accept that this is a step along the path to something better? This is really up to you, it's your creation.
    At the moment I write down every day how I want to feel, what I plan to do, what if ... In the evening I read a chapter in one of my Abe books. It would be great if I didn't have to write all this down anymore, but could put myself mentally in a better state. Music makes my cells float and my mood immediately rises.


    My reality is also still the same.


    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    If you want things to change, yes.
    I want that, yes. Absolutely.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Yes, you've got to change first. Everything around you is following your lead.
    I understand. It just takes practice and patience. Not exactly my strengths.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Sure there are, you just need to look for them. Maybe the topic of kittens or puppies or big, fluffy bunnies feels good when you think about them. Maybe nature or art are things you enjoy. Perhaps there are topics that you really don't have any fight with, whether it's something like bubbles or philosophy or astrophysics. There's an entire Universe out there, they're not all a bit sluggish. Not only is there the actual, physical universe, humanity has imagined other universes out there too that you can enjoy. Flowers, sunsets, otters, unicorns. There are abstract things as well: kindness, adventure, curiosity, beauty, wonder. They don't all feel a bit sluggish, you're just being lazy in choosing the things you're used to thinking about instead of choosing things based on how they feel.
    You are smart and wise.


    It's mundane and bumpy, but yes, there are a few things that make me happy. My MacBook Pro. Music. To dance. Enjoy the sunny weather. The delicacy that I cooked. All the inspiration on this forum.

  4. #44

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    Another thing that can be an obstacle, but reality is: Corresponding occupational fields are remunerated accordingly. With an apprenticeship or even a degree, you automatically get more money. Of course, I could learn another profession and go back to school. Because in my job there is no chance to work due to the corona pandemic. So I'm a stranger in every job and without the appropriate training I'm always at the bottom of the ladder. Of course, if I feel better and better every day, it could be different and happy for me, but isn't that the needle in the haystack I'm looking for? Someone in another job looks for their line of work and gets the corresponding salary.

  5. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Yes, I want a different reality and it would be great if I could jump right into the greatest of circumstances. Just because I want to. Just like that, just for fun.
    But you can't. LOA won't let you and the more you wish you were somewhere else instead of making peace with where you are, the more you get bogged down and resentful that you can't seem to move.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Today everything was as usual. You mean, if I feel better and better at home, will the circumstances at my workplace change? Oh my god, Marc, what you say is infinitely great. Not that the professor starts cleaning.
    Of course today everything was as usual, you're just getting started with all this. If you change your order at the restaurant, will they give you different food when you pick it up? Yes, that's how restaurants work. If you start finding ways to feel better about your job (and about anything else) when you're at home, LOA has to reflect back that you're feeling better. So yes, the conditions will have to improve.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    It could be that I get to a better place or that I find a completely different job (I have to write an application for that) or this or that. Oh yes, I like that very much.
    Exactly. It's quite possible that you're inspired to a different job, and it will be easy and obvious what you need to do for that to happen. That's what "inspired action" is all about.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    No, I really don't want that. I've had enough of it.
    Then time to stop telling that story.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Yes, that sounds great. Can I have some more, please! I want help, support. I want to have a little more fun and enjoyment at work. Yes why not?! There is nothing wrong with that. A little more of all the good things every day. I'm here.
    So how does that idea feel? How about imagining your day with things being not so hard? What about starting to think about what you do at your job as something more important and valuable than you've been making it? Maybe you think about your job in softer, more general terms -- it's nice to have ways for income to flow in, it's nice to have a reason to focus, etc. These are just ideas to give you a start.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    And I'm so good at nagging. Really, I am the queen of whining.
    Perhaps you used to be, but do you need to keep being good at it? You can practice doing something different if you like.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    At the moment I write down every day how I want to feel, what I plan to do, what if ... In the evening I read a chapter in one of my Abe books. It would be great if I didn't have to write all this down anymore, but could put myself mentally in a better state. Music makes my cells float and my mood immediately rises.

    My reality is also still the same.
    Then you have your proof that those things aren't really shifting your vibration. So time to try some different approaches.

    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    It's mundane and bumpy, but yes, there are a few things that make me happy. My MacBook Pro. Music. To dance. Enjoy the sunny weather. The delicacy that I cooked. All the inspiration on this forum.
    So start spending more time focused on those things. Notice the things you like about your MacBook Pro -- the design, how well engineered and built it is, how easy it is to use, the many people who participated in creating it and getting it to you. Remember those sunny days that are your favorite. Remember the sun on your face, a cool breeze, etc. Use your imagination to please you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    Another thing that can be an obstacle, but reality is: Corresponding occupational fields are remunerated accordingly. With an apprenticeship or even a degree, you automatically get more money. Of course, I could learn another profession and go back to school. Because in my job there is no chance to work due to the corona pandemic. So I'm a stranger in every job and without the appropriate training I'm always at the bottom of the ladder. Of course, if I feel better and better every day, it could be different and happy for me, but isn't that the needle in the haystack I'm looking for? Someone in another job looks for their line of work and gets the corresponding salary.
    You are the creator of your own reality. Sure, it CAN be an obstacle, but does it have to be? Do you WANT it to be? Do you really want improvement to be a needle in a haystack? Or would you prefer what you describe to be simply one possible way forward out of many different paths? Do you really want any way forward to be long and difficult? Or would you prefer that there are easier ways to go about things too? You get to decide, reality will actualize around whatever you offer consistently. With that being the case, you really have to start paying attention to how things FEEL instead of whether you believe they're true. "True" just means "practiced."

  6. #46

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    Thank you very much for all these helpful thoughts and good approaches. They are great for my next step.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    (...) If you change your order at the restaurant, will they give you different food when you pick it up? Yes, that's how restaurants work. If you start finding ways to feel better about your job (and about anything else) when you're at home, LOA has to reflect back that you're feeling better. So yes, the conditions will have to improve.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Exactly. It's quite possible that you're inspired to a different job, and it will be easy and obvious what you need to do for that to happen. That's what "inspired action" is all about.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Then time to stop telling that story.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    So how does that idea feel? How about imagining your day with things being not so hard? What about starting to think about what you do at your job as something more important and valuable than you've been making it? Maybe you think about your job in softer, more general terms -- it's nice to have ways for income to flow in, it's nice to have a reason to focus, etc. These are just ideas to give you a start.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    (...) You can practice doing something different if you like.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Then you have your proof that those things aren't really shifting your vibration. So time to try some different approaches.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    So start spending more time focused on those things. Notice the things you like about your MacBook Pro -- the design, how well engineered and built it is, how easy it is to use, the many people who participated in creating it and getting it to you. Remember those sunny days that are your favorite. Remember the sun on your face, a cool breeze, etc. Use your imagination to please you.
    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    You are the creator of your own reality. Sure, it CAN be an obstacle, but does it have to be? Do you WANT it to be? Do you really want improvement to be a needle in a haystack? Or would you prefer what you describe to be simply one possible way forward out of many different paths? Do you really want any way forward to be long and difficult? Or would you prefer that there are easier ways to go about things too? You get to decide, reality will actualize around whatever you offer consistently. With that being the case, you really have to start paying attention to how things FEEL instead of whether you believe they're true. "True" just means "practiced."
    I rephrased Abraham's question ("What if ..."): "How would my life change if I got this job ..." I find the thoughts almost believable when I think about them further. Some ideas are even a little euphoric. I don't know if this is going too far, but I can stop if it seems strange and no longer believable. I'll practice for a couple of days and get used to it and see what happens then.

  7. #47

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    I can't keep my vibration high enough to be a little relaxed and easy going at work. I won't go into details, but it clearly goes too far and I've had enough. I am currently looking for another job in a different area.

  8. #48
    Super Kitty Marc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wilde Rose View Post
    I can't keep my vibration high enough to be a little relaxed and easy going at work.
    Then aim lower. Aim for feeling "less crappy." You can feel less crappy than you usually do and maintain that. Then you can aim for less crappy than that improved place and maintain that. That's how an emotional journey works -- you start where you are and then you move gradually to where you want to be.

  9. #49
    Beloved Woman paradise-on-earth's Avatar
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    You've gotta do the Work! REACH FOR RELIEF.


    You've got to do the work. -This is the thing that we are saying on a pretty regular basis to everyone. You can't keep thinking the same things, and speaking the same things, and doing the same things, and have any vibrational improvement. You've got to insist on vibrational improvement, and the only way you can make any steady vibrational improvement, is to disregard everything that everybody else is saying,

    and only pay attention to what feels better to you.

    And if it feels better to you to be mad, then be mad.
    If it feels better to you to offer blame, then offer blame.
    If it feels better to you to find something to be frustrated about, then be frustrated about it.

    But always reaching for something that gives you a little feeling of relief.

    And it is our promise, that by reaching for relief you will release resistance, and when you release, you will be back in the vibrational alignment with who you are.


    We know that sometimes this [work] feels like slow going, as we are sort of grinding our way up this emotional scale, but you are teachers of teachers and you will be encountering those who cannot make those jumps into those vibrations where you are.

    Just be easy about this and let your mantra be, "I'm gonna make the best of this, I'm gonna make the best of this!" -and feel the difference.


    Sometimes you don't make the best of it, you make the worst of it.
    You'll be here in frustration, and you talk yourself right into anger. And then you take yourself right into a feeling of true disempowerment!

    You can tell when you're making the best of it, and you can tell when you're making the worst of it. And it's time to stop making the worst of it, because you don't have to explain anything to anybody. The reason that you make the worst of it is, because you know with every fibre of your being that things should be going well for you, and when they're not going well for you, you want to explain it in some way.

    But don't explain it by pointing at yourself, in some negative way!

    Point at somebody else, it will feel better for a while.

    And then, eventually, you will not need to point at all- because you'll be in that clear place of connection that is natural to who you are.


    -Abe 2/7/04

  10. #50

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    Quote Originally Posted by Marc View Post
    Then aim lower. Aim for feeling "less crappy." You can feel less crappy than you usually do and maintain that. Then you can aim for less crappy than that improved place and maintain that. That's how an emotional journey works -- you start where you are and then you move gradually to where you want to be.
    I know, I need to feel a little less crappy than usual. Sometimes it works fine. Sometimes not so good.

    I have an allergy to vinyl gloves or detergents. Everything was fine on vacation. It's not a big deal. You avoid the allergenic substance and the red, itchy allergy will heal. If not, the dermatologist will prescribe cortisone.
    My foreman said, oh no, you don't need to see a doctor. Certainly not. Otherwise there is a personnel problem. Two colleagues have resigned and a reliable person who works cleanly is now being sought for the laboratory. She asked me if I would like to do it. I don't know if I want to. She said the work was a little easier and not as difficult as it was on the ward. Only working hours are problematic for most people: 5 a.m. - 9 a.m. or 5 p.m. - 9 p.m. I currently work from 6 a.m. - 10 a.m.
    Did I get the offer because of my less shitty feelings or did I whine too much? Well, I've been ranting a lot in the past few days. But not only. At home or outside, my mood was always better than in the hospital.

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